it was not the best birthday. i thought i was faking happiness pretty well but by quarter to eight in the am the illusion had been shattered and i was talking about how i hate my life right now. presents helped restore my faith in humanity. and a card with elton john* singing me happy birthday provided the comic relief i needed.
plus other people were great. i have birthday mardi gras people, board game people, dvd people, flower people, cake people, scarf people and book voucher people. i have a nephew who keeps trying to kiss me and parents who make a delicious bbq even though it is cold and starting to rain.
but the problem with feeling miserable is that even when you have awesome people you still basically want to go to the bathroom and cry. and wear your sunglasses on the bus just in case you think too hard about stuff then your eyes well up with tears and people will think you're mental. when the thing is you are simply miserable. plus i don't like to talk about my misery with others really. i may pay a professional. that, at least, is my dream.
but on the upside at least i'm not joey potter. for my birthday i bought season six of dawsons and in tonight's episode it is joey's birthday too. and she is left heart broken and crying and dawson calls her a child. which is true, but hello on your birthday you should be immune from home truths. you should also be immune from misery. but life isn't perfect. damn it.
_______________*not the real elton.
6 comments:
The internet called and told me it was your birthday. Or rather, I received an automatically-generated message that said: "Reminder: it's Gabrielle's birthday." So I thought I should stop by.
I just wanted to say a) happy birthday, and b) if you're feeling discouraged, I told a friend in a similar situation recently that the first encouraging thing that came to my mind was, in all seriousness, fresh vegetables. Yes, I'm not kidding -- I find them genuinely reassuring. This is why you will find me excitedly racing home from work during the summer months to meet my neighbor and go work on our garden plot together. There is a whole history there reaching back to my childhood, but I will just say, I hope that you have something to turn to in which to find similar solace and put things right.
Because as long as there are things like fresh vegetables in the world, life can't be all that bad.
And again, happy birthday.
We sends hugs and warm enveloping comfort vibes on your birthday.
:)
thanks for the vegetable advice pete. i will get on it. also, thanks for the hugs. i'm so much more personable and less miserable today. and so much less self indulgent, which probably makes me better to be around. how disappointing that i was unbearable on my birthday. of all days.
Happy birthday! I had a birthday recently and I woke up feeling sick, never saw a friend all day, ended up doing laundry, etc. etc. if it makes you feel better!
i forgot we basically have the same birthday. happy birthday jessica. and oddly, i think we had basically the same kind of day too. laundry, however, was far more productive than my misery.
"Happy firkin birthday" you lovely gorgeous lady you. Big over seas kisses, hugs and lifts.
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