6am - awoken by my cellphone alarm. i set it for 6 weekdays, but i hadn't changed it. as a result i woke up the other bridesmaid and my sister. we were sharing the "best room" at the brentwood.

6.05am - my sister is jumping up and down, basically dressed, insisting that we should go out for breakfast.

9am - we are finally ready to go out to breakfast.

10.00am - we finally agree on a place to eat breakfast (eva dixons at the zoo. the ZOO. you can see meerkats while you sip your coffee, or bourbon and coke in the case of my sister).

11 am - my sister decides her wedding shoes, which she bought 3 months ago, aren't good enough. so we head into town to buy new shoes.

noon - my sister finds new shoes that she likes! but in the process i have bought a new pair of shoes too (i'm an addict. it is like taking a alcoholic to a bar).

1 pm - still shopping. this time for doublesided tape. my sister doesn't like how her dress sits so she wants us, the bridesmaids, to tape it to her so that it sits well for the photos.

2 pm - back at hotel, sister has a bath with the special bath products i gave her (so delicious smelling) and i go for a swim. part way through i realise i have an audience. the restaurant looks RIGHT ON TO THE POOL. and an elderly couple haven't taken their eyes off me. then i notice my audience is even bigger than that, it includes five of my cousins!

2.30pm - 0ut of the pool to discover four of my aunts and two of my uncles are staying in the hotel as well. best part - two of my aunts are sharing a room right next door to the honeymoon suite.

2.35pm - "where's *your* boyfriend". sigh.

3pm - sister's hair looking great. I say "awesome. you should just try and fix the back a little".

3.01pm - sister's hair looks awful. she blames me. she cries.

3-4pm - crying.

4.30pm - cousin nina dragged in to help me deal with the hair issue

4.35pm - cousin nina sent away by bride.

4.45pm - fifteen minutes until wedding - still tears - i decide maybe i should get ready.

4.50pm - my brother's ... girlfriend(?)... arrives and saves the day hairwise.

4.55pm - my dad comes to pick us up. he is instructed to watch tele.

5.05pm - we start taping the dress to my sister. she looks gorgeous. both with and without the tape. also she practices her vows and discovers she can't remember any of them.

5.15 pm - we decide too windy to walk to the clubrooms (which are about two minutes walk away and where the wedding is taking place). so dad drives us in his truck. he is told to drop us behind another building. noone is supposed to know about the truck-as-limo story.

5.20 (ish) - ceremony. the world's cheesiest wedding song is played as we walk down the aisle. and the groom looks so goofy i almost want to cry (but i don't, obviously). my mother is crying buckets. my dad looks bewildered. the vows are short and sweet. they are discussed here. the signing of the wedding register takes longer than the rest of the ceremony. people keep trying to kiss me. i lap it up.

6 ish - photos. they are super informal.

7 ish - dinner. hangi. beautiful hangi. it was cooked to perfection. the last one i had was flavourless and could have done with a few hours more. but not this one. the best part of being part of the bridal party was that i got food to my table. everyone else had to get up and help themselves buffet style.

7.30 ish - speeches. somewhere betwen 6 and 7 i borrowed a pen and some old receipts of my brother's ... girlfriend(?)... and write some notes. i feel bad for my lack of preparation. all bad feelings disappear as i realise that i am the *most* prepared of all the speakers. the central theme of my speech is thankfulness. speech gets off to a bad start when bestman makes fun of my height - or lack thereof - before i even begin. but i recover. and have the place in the palm of my hand. especially with my jokes.

i have two favourite moments from the speeches. the first isn't really a moment, but a series of moments. my sister is completely drunk by the time of the speeches so she keeps telling people what to say. i'm not sure if the guests heard it but FARCK it was hilarious. especially when her pathological liar friend got up and told a story and my sister sat back "whispering" that she's a liar and the story never happened. second favourite moment was the waiata and haka after my dad's speech. my cousins are awesome.

9-10 pm: socialising. through socialising process discover that my new brother in law's family are nuts. and they think my best friends are in a lesbian relationship. which is why my brother in law's brother isn't hitting on them. hmmm. i think that this was lucky for them.

10-11 pm: i find my camera and start a series of portraits entitled "me with people at the party". they are all awesome

11.05pm - my 16 year old cousin jack is taken behind the bar to a room where he can vomit in peace. not a bad casualty list really.

11.10pm - new brother in law nearly makes me cry by saying that when he saw me come down the aisle he thought i looked so beautiful he cried. before he even saw the bride. he has won me over for life.

11.15 pm: have a conversation with my brother's best friend about girls.

HIM: yeah, they just say "you're too hot to not have a girlfriend".

ME: you're not that hot.

HIM: there is this one real old chick who keeps throwing herself at me. it's embarrassing.

ME: how old is she?

HIM: i dunno, like 27.

ME: i'm going home now.

11.40: i finally finish kissing everyone at the party and get out of staying later by agreeing to go to my parent's bbq on sunday to see everyone again (fyi i'm meant to be there now but can't face it).

11.50: just about home, realise my sister will kill me. i have 147 photos on my camera. only around 7 of them don't have me in them.

12.30 - fall asleep in bridesmaid dress. it had been a hard day.