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2009-11-19T12:46:00.000+13:00

The differences between nz and Britain:

1) in new Zealand I go to work. In England I go to Christmas markets.

2) in new Zealand our currency is the nz$. in England the currency is the £. I sometimes forget about conversion rates and think I am getting a bargain. Eg £12 lunch does not actually equal a bargain.

3) in new Zealand you can catch a train to Johnsonville. In England you can catch trains to places you've only dreamed about. Like Wales. Or Birmingham (note: I have not been to Wales, that was a hypothetical).

4) in new Zealand you have two choices for winter coats: max or the Kingston coat factory. In England they are everywhere. Which is how I ended up with a new duffle despite trying to limit what I buy so it will be easier to catch trains through Europe.

5)in new Zealand ice skating is restricted to remote parts of the south island and dorkland. In England you can see ice skaters in every town. Which is why I am going to hell. Ice skaters bring me so much joy it must be sinful.

There are lots more differences of course. Like how the tv is different in each country. But I will skip to telling you how I am having a great time. York is my favourite place so far but Manchester sti has a couple of days to win me over.

- Posted using BlogPress from my iPhone

Eating as donating

2009-11-13T03:13:00.000+13:00

I heart Liverpool. I arrived yesterday and fell instantly in love. You need a warm jacket for the weather and coping strategies for dealing with the beatles overload (my strategy is listening to the stone roses on my iPod). But those things aside Liverpool is a treat.

I arrived right in time for an armistice day service at st george's hall. It was actually quite moving, and I confess that like the oldies next to me I had a tear in my eye. War sux.

It is also strangely moving just being in Liverpool. Grandma was born here and I have the address. But am sort of avoiding going. I am being overly sentimental about it I think, which I put down to the worst jet lag I have had yet (only sleeping 2/4 nights I have been in the country plus not sleeping on the flight here - well at least not sleeping much - I normally adjust much quicker than this).

Actually this tiredness it pretty stink. I have bursts of energy in the morning that die by lunchtime. But the fringe benefit is that today I am treating myself with what is rumoured to be a Michelin star quality lunch. Which has the added benefit of supporting my favourite museum in Liverpool: the maritime.

This afternoon, once I finish my lunch, I am headed to explore the rest of Albert docks. I understand there is a beatles museum and a boat tour. I am more interested in the latter. But the former is free. And since I haven't yet got the bill for lunch, I am guessing that free will mean the price is right. And afterall, I have just spent the last half an hour diligently supporting Liverpool museums.

I am such a patron of the arts.

-- Posted from my iPhone

Manx

2009-11-10T18:43:00.000+13:00

I am in Manchester. 1st impression: good. No small feat since I arrived exhausted. Hrc though played the excellent hostess, providing a home cooked meal then taking me to the Hilton bar for cocktails. And unlike the first time I came to England, this time I didn't fall down any steps afterwards.

Yesterday, my first day proper, involved a walking tour of Manx. The stationery!!!!!!! I have bought enough postcards for you all to get five each and I don't plan to stop. The other highlight was the food. The English know comfort food. Bacon butties, fish finger sandwiches, apple pies. All punctuated with pots of delicious tea.

We also hit the high street. I wanted a winter coat. There is lots of choice and I have some finalists but trying things on when you have hundreds of layers on is not an exciting prospect. I ignored that though when it came on to trying on my new panda sweater. Thank you top shop for your mass produced awesome.

And I rode on the Manchester eye. Or ferris wheel or whatever. That was also awesome. In part for the view and in part for the unhelpful voice over telling you what you could see, even when you were at the bottom of the wheel and could actually only see the ticket booth. Highly comical.

Today has begun kind of sux though since it is five AM and I am wide awake. And have been for like an hour. Bloody body clock. I am sure today will be aces. Cos it will involve museum gift shops. But right now: my kingdom for two or three more hours of sleep.

Posted from my iPhone

Holiday rituals

2009-11-07T17:02:00.001+13:00

When I go on vacay I have a host of rituals. Buying a new molskine. Overpacking. And my favourite: sitting in Wellington airport's koruclub blogging.

This vacation might be the best yet. And it involves the longest long haul ever. Thirty five hours or something. I struggle to do the math. But I take great comfort in two things: the first is the flight control iPhone app. The second is my travel wallet.

If only I had this wallet when I went to visit al in Westport. If I had then maybe I wouldn't have missed my plane by three hours and been forced to pay $350 for a twenty five minute flight the next day.

Also, if you follow me on Twitter (and you should cos I'm hilarious in 140 characters or less on a regular basis) you will already know about how I have a third reason to be confident I can manage the long haul..... Business class. Those years of airnz loyalty have paid off with something tangible at last.

Anyway, they are bringing out fresh food in the lounge and I would not want to miss out. But keep checking back. I am doubtless going to be sitting next to a celeb in business class and you would not want to miss the update.

**update**

Now in dorkland. Zero celebs. Which reminds me how some of my friends met Paris Hilton on their last holiday. Of course I saw Craig Parker when I went to Samoa so I am not without my own celbrity anecdotes.

Also, I am doing lots of stretches and am drinking beer- guaranteed to make me sleepy.

**update 2**

In hong kong. Best part of business class was that the stewards acted like they really cared for my welfare. They basically forced chocolate bars on me when they accidentally woke me up. If only my neighbour Sarah would do that everytime she plays lady gaga at three in the morning.

The downsides of business class are basically related to how it ended. Have to go back and sit with the paupers from here to heathrow. Also - apart from how I sort of got some sleep it wasn't actually enough.
-- Posted from my iPhone

2009-11-02T22:36:00.004+13:00

pretty much the greatest thing ever invented is flight control.

this is a stock image. fyi, my high score is MUCH higher than 15

flight control is an application on my iphone that lets me play air traffic controller. i am so john cusack in pushing tin. and we all know, even in a lesser movie john cusack is always awesome.

i bought flight control because it gets good ratings as a game to play on an plane. and i am all about hot tips for in flight entertainment, since on saturday i'm embarking on EUROPE 09.

europe 09 is set to be the best holiday yet. lots of friend time. lots of me time. lots of train time. and not a moment too soon because wellington 09 has not been the thrill a minute i'd been hoping for. on the upside, wellington 09 has meant spanish tapas night at liquidate. my new monday tradition. so i can't complain too much.

anyway with the prospect of europe 09 comes the prospect of more blogging from me. get your rss feeds primed and ready to go. because, in the immortal words of michael jordan: i'm back.

2009-07-10T13:38:00.002+12:00

i never blog anymore. mostly cos of twitter to be honest. which is obviously a cliche.

i only communicate in 140 characters these days.

such as:

i am going to melbourne. lucky ahe?

i am listening to a lot of MJ at mo'. esp thriller. reminds me of sleepovers in the 80s.

i spent too much money in the last 48 hours. so much for recessionbudget.

i have a snotty nose. hope i can still get thru border control.

2009-06-01T19:49:00.003+12:00

i'm still alive and stuff. just too cold to think out a blog post fully. even this one is squeezed in between dinner and going to a movie.

what really inspired me to actually blog today was kind of jeff buckley. who has prompted a post from me before. but anyway i was watching the amazing grace documentary on saturday night (being a thirty something, having an early night). and there was this excerpt from his diary that was along the line that he wrote music for people who scream down the highway, listening to loud music, with tears in their eyes. which made me feel ill because of that time i listened to cold play and got all weapy.

but then today i was driving home from levin, where i'd spent my morning looking for an open cafe (fyi i don't really recommend the old railway station as a back up cafe) and then swimming in the swimming pool with the coolest four year old in history. driving along listening to my ipod on shuffle, when what comes on but kenny roger's reuben james. and i start to get all weapy again because IT IS ONLY THE GREATEST SONG OF ALL TIME....

the first concert i ever went to was kenny. i was five. for most of my life i think that my father has had a kenny rogers look to him (the beard thing). we used to watch kenny on the tele as a family. and goshdarn it if my parents don't still fight over how my dad has taken kenny's greatest hits out of the living room and into his car without consultation. so i have a kenny soft spot anyway, but seriously a song about a no-count share croppin' coloured man, who didn't turn his back on a hungry white child with no name. it will bring me to tears everytime.

2009-05-14T17:49:00.003+12:00

i wish samoa was all mine. not mine as in a colony or something. just mine as in my special secret. because the fact that other people who are not me are in samoa right now and enjoying it is literally breaking my heart.

i only got back this afternoon. the wounds of leaving are still fresh.

i would like to retain some mystery so you're not going to get a blow by blow account. needless to say every minute was awesome. even when it involved you being herded like cattle by police. POLICE. in the best uniforms ever by the way.

one of the things about samoa is you can always swim. ALWAYS. here i am on one of my first days in samoa. heading to the beach. taking to the lifestyle like a duck to water.

some of you* will be getting awesome postcards from me. samoa is filled to the brim with awesome postcards. anyway, i won't spoil those. but apia was SURPRISINGLY EXHAUSTING. i was offered about a thousand $10 lava lava. and had my bag checked at the grocery store. i looked suss. obviously. walking down the street took it out of you something chronic. thank god i was staying on the other side of the island. at a resort that offered afternoon tea every day at three.

at the end of the day though, it is the natural beauty of samoa that was the breathtaking part. like the waterfalls. the WATERFALLS.

this one is on upolu. after taking this photo a man made us coconut cream from scratch. touristy? yes. but he wasn't a tour guide. so there.

this one is on savai'i. we told ourselves it was the waterfall from the king kapisi video clip. but i was told otherwise by one of my new boyfs. and while i believed him MOSTLY at the time i've looked at the video clip again, and he was right. you can watch it here. and incidentally everything in this video clip i basically saw.

oh yeah, and in samoa there are lots of boys dying to flirt with you. honest to goodness. if you're lucky they will make you feel like a teenager again. leaving you giggling at the message they sent you via their babyfaced friend and having to sneak into your fale drunk on the excitement. and on the vailima. and maybe the whiskey too if i'm being honest. oh the boys! how many hearts did i break in the past week? heaps.

the biggest heart break is my own. i've fallen hard for samoa. and i won't hear a thing against it. and staying at a resort, which initially worried me, turns out to be the only way to live. refer to afternoon tea comment above. on my last day i lay on the beach and read. and slept. and listened to my ipod. and looked up at this....

and tried not to think too much about what i was leaving behind. and the characters i'd met. and the unexpected delights everywhere (like watching the sound of music on the ferry from savai'i to upolu and having a number of cute singalong moments with the guy next to me). and the bananas. have you had the bananas? like honestly they are the best thing in the world apart from samoa. and my new favourite song, i choose you. which i hope pumps in the apia clubs for years to come.

* not all of you though. my hotel ran out of stamps and the postoffice that was meant to be open until midday closed at eleven. for no apparent reason. samoa forever.

2009-04-21T21:35:00.002+12:00

so i'm boycotting the dancing with the stars finale. but this is no political move. merely negligence on my part. for the second time today i forgot it was on. the ex internet dater said something scandalous today about her doubts that it will be renewed for 2010 due to a lack of celebrities. but that is so entirely untrue because new zealand is filled to the brim with people i would like to see tango and foxtrot and whatnot.

so here it is, my top eight new zealand celebrities that i would like to see on dwts.

1. nick tansley.

he already does standup in the ad breaks for the live studio audience, so he'd have a bit of an advantage. i don't think it will help though. he'll be elminated in the first week.

2. catherine mcpherson. the best ever host of what now? it would be great to see her and jase reunited. basically catherine has no internet presence but she was the one who hosted in the simon barnett era. if she isn't available suggest inspector sniff or frank flash. could go the distance to the grand final.

3. ben lummis.

i would be worried about the hip gyration that marked his idol performances - but that was mostly just poor choreography. when paired with krystal stewart though this shouldn't be a problem. he'll be elminated week four or five.

4. jeff wilson. i met him multiple times. and owned his 'autobiography'. my fifteen year old self was obsessed. now at thirty it has strangely worn off. still i think he'd be worth a go. but would undoubtedly be eliminated week two.

5. robin reynolds. she slept with robbie williams, before our rachel. and ran to the tabloids. officially making it new zealand's proudest day. she needs more time in the spotlight. but won't be in the final.

6. darren hughes, mp.

i'm following him on twitter. he is a bit dry. but could be the next rodney hide. guaranteed giggles. but perhaps he will just prove to be a kiwi battler and blow the competition out of the water. until week three or four.

7. one or both of the evers swindells. they are famous to the maximum. and unlike that mahe drysdale don't drink the water and get giardia the day before the BIG RACE. strong finishers, i think they will struggle but pull through to be in the top half of the competition.

8. paired with steffano judy bailey would be a shoe in for the final. this doesn't even need explanation.

others have tried making lists. like here. but frankly, mine is the best. because noone wants to see more of mark sainsbury than they already do. frankly.

2009-04-12T21:13:00.004+12:00

...a long and indulgent post on how i met ethan hawke....

on wednesday i went to dorkland. to see the killers. but frankly, somehow, i'd almost forgotten about the killers in my planning, because i was so fixated on how i desperately needed to be a lady of leisure. sometimes you just need to get your groove back. you know what i'm saying?

to cut a long story short: success.

to cut a medium length story long, i hadn't really eaten dinner before the killers on wednesday night. just lukewarm chips from the venue. so afterwards i was starved. but also i couldn't eat. because i sometimes get waves of horrible as i think that maybe brandon flowers and i will NOT be together for a moment, let alone forever. so i ended up fulfilling essentially my OTHER life's ambition by eating in the bright green korean place on the corner of queen street and mayoral drive. and it wasn't too bad. the korean television show that was on took my mind temporarily off brandon.

the next morning we got up early for a swim and jacuzzi. the langham, where we were staying, is the best dorkland hotel i've ever had. top notch. anyway, after the health club morning, we ate breakfast and then went to mt eden. if you know mt eden, you'll think we were nuts. but on the airport bus it looks so hip and happening. it must have been the confusing dusk light though. because it was a bit of a fail. but at least we got a cup of tea at a chain cafe and mistaken for students. the latter is the impressive bit. given i'm now thirty mumble.

anyway, next stop (after a hail storm) was equipoise in herne bay. so good i fell asleep i think. i can't be entirely sure. it was all a blur of aromatherapy and relaxation. which, while dealing to the stress i carry in my shoulders also served to remind us that we were starved. so after a trip to $3Japan (my vote for auckland city top shop) we went to a hole in the wall japanese place on elliot street. for noodles and gyoza. at some point hrc mentions that she saw this ad for a play or something that had some guy who looks like ethan hawke in it. i'm all like "it IS ethan hawke". because tv 3 cannot leave him alone, so i've picked up the knowledge by osmosis. we also looked at my $3Japan purchases. the pens were not as good as i'd hoped, but otherwise it was cute overload.

then we hit the liquor.

here we are at honey. the cocktail is a honeyberry sour. the taste is delicious. and the company sublime. there is nothing like talking about microwaved ham, stefano oliveri's mouth and the dorkland super city. we had like a hundred cocktails. it was awesome.

then we left honey. the token male of the group left the girls to fight a fire. LITERALLY. as in a bin was on fire. we rang the fire service. and took a lot of photos. one of the fire men asked us if we started it. we giggled (barely, compared to how we were soon to giggle, but at the time it seemed like school girl behaviour) and the fireman pointed his hose at us and turned it on. just a bit. we were untouched by the water. unlike the rubbish bin, which he expertly doused. such a hero.

after the rubbish bin inferno there was nothing for it but mexican food. on the waterfront. where somehow al rationalised it was better to pay for a hostel than go back to waiheke. so we headed up the hill to the langham and watched episodes of brideshead revisited until we fell asleep (which didn't take long, refer to cocktails above).

friday was waiheke day. there was a queue for the ferry. so we took basically the first seats, near the gangplank. and watched people come on. apparently, ethan hawke had already been to waiheke. feeling stink that we'd missed a star encounter we played this game where every man that came on the boat we'd nudge each other and say "there's ethan". it was hilarious.

until ethan hawke walked onto the ferry and ruined it.

he went upstairs. and for the next half an hour i was in hysterics. i couldn't read. i couldn't look at the view. i couldn't do anything but think of reality bites trivia. and wipe the tears from my eyes.

in the last five minutes of the ferry ride we couldn't handle it anymore. and decided to "see the view from the top". we found a position right next to ethan. and promptly began to laugh nervously and uncontrollably.

you know what i learned about myself in those minutes: i'm an opportunist. so when it came time to disembark, i lined up directly behind him. basically touching his brushed cotton shirt. almost holding his hand on the rails. and actually snorting and unable to hold it together.

once we finally got off the boat, i made hrc pose for a photo but hello, it wasn't about her. it was all about ethan....

i'm telling myself ethan's fist has nothing to do with being photographed. and btw: hottie alert!

and then we spent the next four hours on waiheke laughing uncontrollably and wondering what ethan was doing. we ate a small seventy dollar a head lunch at mudbrick. and i hoped that at any moment he would walk in....

he didn't.

on waiheke we went to al's bedsit, we read (or attempted to) and we visited beaches and patted dogs. we also talked a LOT about ethan hawke. we called him ed. to be less obvious. and my stomach was in pain from the laughing.

back at the ferry terminal we thought it was too unlikely we'd have the good fortune to be on the same ferry as ed. so we played the "there's ethan" game again. hrc spotted some dude and was all like "he's familiar". i dismissed him as a former melody rules star: then it hit me - it was principal charleston from gilmore girls. this was almost too much to take. although al also thought she saw chandler from friends. so some of our guesses were WAY off.

as we walked to the ferry to line up we looked back and lo! ethan was buying coffee. we became hysterical again. once on the ferry we tried calming down. al was the best but me and hrc were hopeless cases. especially when principal charleston sat in direct view. but it gets worse! or better? ethan hawke sits directly opposite me.

albeit one table away, but nothing obstructed our views of eachother. i stared a bit. thank god for sunglasses (which by the way become unplausible at six thirty in the evening so had to come off after a time).

after a time of pretending to read, it became obvious that ethan was doing the cross word and was stuck on a question. he was asking his cast mates (who were also on the ferry, including dakin matthews and sinead cusack) the questions. but we had resourcefulness in our favour. and cellphones. so it was all lined up when ethan leaned across his table, looked me straight in the eyes and said

"do you know new zealand's largest cattle station".

you know what i learned about myself in these moments: i cope well under pressure. so i can't walk off a gangplank with him but i can answer his questions directly and charmingly.

i admit that i've been listening to his conversation and have been thinking about it. "i think it's molesworth".

there is near tragedy when he asks if it is north or south island ("god only knows" i'm thinking). but a simple 'south of here' kind of sort of covers me. although al and hrc probably have different opinions. we talk about fort worth. or something, it is a blur. and he thanks me for playing a part in completing his crossword.

the ferry ride is over in a flash and i'm mourning it. until, as we are disembarking together for the second time that day, ethan comes up to me and says that his 100% completed cross word is all due to me. ME. i tell him i'm proud of him. he tells me he's proud of me. it's what you'd call our bit. or shtick.

at this point al takes over and i go into a haze. who knows what happens but somehow we end up across the street. ed-less. when ethan catches up with us again. as in troy dyer hastened his pace to catch up with me. ME. i won't bore you with details but he mentioned his hotel room. okay, i will bore you, he wanted to know where to buy poker chips because he wanted to play poker in his room. still, awesome ahe?

btw during this entire three part conversation hrc says nothing.

but once we lose ethan we all break back into hysterics, and are exhausted from holding it together as long as we did. we go back to the langham and sit in the jacuzzi trying to list the other hollywood stars we would feel this way about (keanu reeves only, although i also think maybe ewan mcgregor could almost make up the holy trinity - people considered but not admitted to the trinity include will smith and brad pitt by reason of them being too famous. but also thank god i haven't met will smith. he owes me $15 and two hours of my life after seven pounds).

the end. there is unfortunately no post script. except how al went to see his play the next day. sadly, hrc and i had to fly back to wellington. so missed it. apparently it was very very good.

you know what else was very very good? everything about ethan hawke. he is so my fallback guy if me and brandon don't work out. and he is charminger, hotter and sexier voiced than you can imagine.

2009-04-11T22:15:00.002+12:00

so anyway, dorkland is my new favourite town. i have so much to tell you about it but it will have to wait for another day as i've just spent my precious time on a review of the killers here.

i adore brandon flowers and take exception to the hearld referring to him as a dan carter lookalike. seriously. that is the worst insult i've heard so far.

but whatever, me and brandon forever.

2009-04-05T21:08:00.002+12:00

good lord. now i'm thirty all i want to do is sleep. i'm not even attempting to be funny. it is just the way it is.

i am awesome at sleeping. so, being thirty continues to rule.

anyway, here are the other eleven things rocking my world at this exact point in time:

1. trivia. so today i watched two episodes of brideshead revisted (1981, bbc). frankly, it was awesome. and i'm so IN to the guy who plays sebastian.

if i owned this photo i'd totoally put a watermark all over it too. sebastian flyte AND royalty. it is photographic GOLD.

so to the trivia.... did you know remington steel was created for him, but he TURNED IT DOWN. god bless him too. because that is directly responsible for last year's greatest movie moment. sigh.

2. l'occitane shower gel. seriously, you should get some of this. it is like crack. for your skin. i can't find an image of it on the line. the l'occitane online store for nz doesn't seem to have it. so i'm linking you to a site i in no way endorse. here. anyway, i figure if you spend more than $30 on shower gel you are simply a better class of person. i am therefore, closer to god as a result of this purchase.

3. no-no-notorious b.i.g. have you seen the movie notorious? you really should see it. 7/10. you should also buy going back to cali from itunes. it is my new favourite song. well that plus let's get it on. the latter thanks to catching two minutes of idol this week. it was motown week on idol. but that doesn't qualify it for my list of eleven things.

4. mexicana breakfast from pranah. it is really good.

5. safety message. like in this poster i just bought from etsy dot com. i can barely wait to see if it is as awesome in real life as it is on the internet.

6. thorndon summer pool. it closes this thursday so you should hurry up and visit. i went today. it was not especially warm. so i retired to the spa instead. and sat there for like an hour. it was thoroughly exhausting. and awesome, obviously. six dollars well spent.

7. ryles, singing TI's "whatever you like" to me over the phone. i am so in love with my nephews. they are adorable. and will get spoiled at easter. if i have my way that is.

8. this website. which is where i got the number eleven for my list today. it combines two of my passions: lists and lauding music knowledge over people.

9. massage. i had a hot stone massage this week. i thought i might pass out from bliss midway through it. it was a gift from my team at work. and it is safe to say, best work gift ever.

10. neon tiger by the killers.

you know i'm going to see them this wednesday night ahe? i actually realised earlier today that i have so deified brandon flowers that i may vomit when he comes on stage and proves to be merely a man. a hot man, but still only flesh and bone and a killer smile.

11. the internet. for reasons like this.

2009-03-28T18:48:00.002+13:00

now that i'm thirty i'm a different person. i have a different favourite cocktail: delovely martini from hawthorne lounge. and a different favourite song:

the favourite song thing happened last night when i went to see kings of leon. for my review, click here.

2009-03-26T23:40:00.004+13:00

guess who thinks thirty is awesome? me

i love thirty because at thirty you can wear your slippers in to town. you can get a deluxe massage and drink coffee with the ex internet dater like you are a lady of leisure. at thirty you can demand the women at the mac counter give you a make over. and at thirty you can buy yourself treats like stationery and manicures. and you can eat chocolate cake in the sun at the dowse. so basically what i'm saying is thirty is THE age to be.

apart from how i have some kind of romantic love for all of my friends right now, i'm so madly in love with my family that i might actually explode. in fact that is why i have a headache right now. thinking about their choiceness is making my head hurt. they threw me a surprise party. sure, there were awkward moments. but mostly not. mostly there were gifts and gossip. and family jokes being shared left right and centre. and handmade gifts from ryles (it was a volcano. apparently). and it was all topped off with a sound of music birthday cake. ie perfection.

tomorrow i will come crashing down to earth. well, perhaps i will. i also think there is a chance i will hook up with one of the kings of leon at their concert on friday night, thus beginning my thirties as a shameless groupie. the next robin reynolds if you will. new zealand will have cause to be proud.

good lord, me turning thirty will probably be not just good for me but for all of new zealand. this is a truly magical day.

2009-03-25T19:43:00.004+13:00

oh cruel time! how you have marched on so swift! one day i was like twenty two and the next day i'm like STARING DOWN THE DARK, COLD, BARREL OF THIRTY. eek.

here is how i look on my last day of my twenties.

dreary.

well not really, that dreary feeling is more internalised.

anyway, even despite the dreary feeling, i'm on a high.

this weekend i had a party. sort of. the sort of is to emphasise that i only invited like thirteen people. turns out it is a lucky number because my party was AWESOME. as was my singstar singing. i've convinced people in my team that i need to show them just how good i am and so i'm taking my playstation to work on friday. well at least that is the story. i might chicken out. because (secretly)... i'm crap. plus by then i will be thirty. positively middle aged. it could be quite sad to watch now i think about it.

tomorrow i'm taking the day off. so i do not have to go around passively aggressively demanding everyone take note of The Occassion. it is a weight of my shoulders i tell you what. i'm also going to be a lady of leisure and buy myself little treats that LAUGH in the face of a recession. think mac beauty products and manicures.

the cherry on the top is family time. my mother has already reminded me the exact time i was born. needless to say, i'll be sleeping through the five thirty one am milestone. and my dad is being coy about our plans. i'm hoping the surprise involves my nephews. or ten pin bowling. or some serious ukelele lessons. have i mentioned i'm not very good.

anyway, right this instant i have to leave because i'm going to see notorious at the embassy in like fifteen minutes. i hope it helps me leave my twenties with a BANG.

2009-03-13T23:10:00.003+13:00

this is my last five things so i better make them good:

21. i am very untidy. i watched wife swap the other day and the house that was so dirty it made the swapped mother cry didn't look so bad to me. luckily for my flatmate i tend to keep my filth to the confines of my room.

22. i love jon stewart but hate seeing photos of him in 'casual' clothes.

he should stick to the corporate suited look. reoooowwww.

23. i hate making small talk in networking or party situations. but i'm so goddamn charming you probably never knew. right (lie to me, it hurts less).

24. my mother once told me that she's never loved anyone more than she loves my nephews. i should have been hurt. but i kind of understand. they are what awesome would look like if it were two brothers.

25. hashbrowns. seriously. they are just about the best food ever invented.

2009-03-12T21:50:00.001+13:00

a while ago i got tagged in about a million facebook 25 things memes. time magazine dubbed it 25 things i didn't want to know about you. i've dubbed it a great way to fill my blog.

part four: 16 - 20

16. my quality of life has actually decreased since they stopped making new episodes of gilmore girls.

17. i don't have a fear of getting older, just a fear of not celebrating my birthday.

18. i wear sunglasses and my ipod on the bus in the morning without fail. it helps me to pretend i'm not really awake. but on rainy days people probably think i have a cataract.

19. i am probably the best freestyle dancer you know. essentially, i am the hot stepper.

20. i have promised myself i will make presents for five people this year. i pitty the lucky people who get my handmade goods. first up: my mum. cos i figure she's obliged to like it.

2009-03-11T21:40:00.000+13:00

a while ago i got tagged in about a million facebook 25 things memes. time magazine dubbed it 25 things i didn't want to know about you. i've dubbed it a great way to fill my blog.

part three: 11 through 15

11. i am struggling with the ukelele. who knew such an adorable instrument would be so infuriating.

12. the other day i was driving and fix you by coldplay came on the radio. that song sux. so i have no idea why i cried like a baby.

13. i have a major crush on new york.

14. i once thought a yellow oversized sweatshirt and purple oversized trackpants equalled high fashion when paired with a green flannel shirt.

15. before when i said coldplay's fix you came on the radio, i lied. it was on my ipod.

2009-03-10T21:29:00.002+13:00

a while ago i got tagged in about a million facebook 25 things memes. time magazine dubbed it 25 things i didn't want to know about you. i've dubbed it a great way to fill my blog.

part two: 6 through 10

6. i used to say my favourite colour was green cos i once read that john lennon's favourite colour was green. i was 14. and impressionable.

7. i don't actually have a favourite colour.

8. ten years ago when i imagined my life now it involved wearing suede jackets and spending a lot of time in antique stores. i was middle aged before my time basically.

9. i have a mental block when it comes to president obama's first name. like i genuinely struggle to remember it. like i'm struggling right now. i have no explanation.

10. i would like martinis to be my signature drink. but realistically it is probably soda water.

2009-03-09T23:02:00.005+13:00

a while ago i got tagged in about a million facebook 25 things memes. time magazine dubbed it 25 things i didn't want to know about you. i've dubbed it a great way to fill my blog.

part one: facts 1 through 5.

1. i got lost in the maize maze on saturday. and what helped me to survive is remembering a jem episode where they stay at a mansion and there is a maze and one of the tricks is to touch a wall and never take your hand off it until you get to the end. god bless rio (unrelated, but true).

2. one of the best days of my life was when my dad brought home izzy, the greatest dog that ever lived. i was ten.

3. i talk up my singstar ability. to put it another way, i'm probably not as good as i've told you i am.

4. last christmas, by wham! is one of the greatest songs i've ever heard.

5. i genuinely can't decide which is better: chocolate or lime milkshakes.

2009-03-07T07:54:00.003+13:00

best use of a lunch break ever.

materials:
*four old and tatty folders
*the woodland-appropriate creatures you've collected unwittingly in your office over the past three years
*scissors
*sticky tape
*childlike enthusiasm

i am so pleased with how my desk looks now. i am *slightly* worried though that it may get in the way of working. but i'm prepared to make that compromise.

2009-03-01T20:49:00.003+13:00

last night i dined in the clouds. basically. which leads me to declare waiheke my most favourite small island and te whau my favourite vineyard.

this is what it looks like.

i have photos of being a booze hound over dinner but this is the koru club and i can't upload my photos. sadly for you. and sadly for you, unless you were AL you weren't there with me. to enjoy what USA today called one of the top five most memorable meals in 2007 and what NYC based magazine wine spectator called "one of the best restaurants in the world for wine lovers". recession? what recession? i'm still living like royalty!

the other thing about waiheke is that it is filled to the brim with characters. like the taxi driver who worked for the red hot chili peppers for 48 hours and tells me that flea still blames himself for river pheonix's death. and the other taxi driver who lives on the island because of the drugs but would give it all up to become a professional black jack player. and the couple who hold sculpture competitions on their lawn, but have a loose definition of sculpture (which is how a blue bowl filled with water and a yellow rubber duck qualifies as a sculpture).

waiheke has a community movie theatre that is basically identical to the one in gilmore girls.

so my life long ambition of going to such a theatre was fulfilled when i saw vicky cristina barcelona (8/10) on a rainy saturday afternoon.

anyway, my flight is FINALLY boarding. hurrah. more later.....

2009-02-18T22:54:00.003+13:00

so i'm back into the cinema in a big way. on monday i saw the best movie ever. milk. you have to see it. and i need to add watching james franco and sean penn hook in to each other to my list of turn ons.

the actors themselves were excited too:

sean penn texted madonna because he was so excited by kissing james franco (fyi breaking up with him was a big mistake madge. huge).

james franco talks about it at length with david letterman. and he also claims to have been in love with sean penn since the beaver trilogy. and guess what? me too. it is the 5th best movie ever (behind milk, sound of music, grease and high school musical three).

9/10

then tonight i saw changeling. angelina jolie needs to eat a goddamn pie. and the movie needs to be 45 minutes shorter. but it was totally watchable. better than the last jolie movie i saw. which was centred on a magic loom. 6.5/10

2009-02-15T17:38:00.003+13:00

today's post is dedicated to this guy. the grand duke of luxembourg, henri. today julia flies to luxembourg. not exactly to hangout with the grand duke. but it will probably happen because luxembourg is tiny. to quote wikipedia "Luxembourg has a population of under half a million people in an area of approximately 2,586 square kilometres (999 sq mi)."

half a million people AND a grand duke. those are good odds.

i also blame the grand duke for the state of my room. in short: ridiculous. i'm trying to find the perfect wedding outfit for next weekend. so naturally everything i own is balled up on the floor. i would have cleaned up after myself, but i'm too depressed about julia leaving.

luckily there is atomic to put the spring in your step. and in your shimmy. i probably saw you there actually. because EVERYONE who is ANYONE was there. but i ducked out for a malt shake about two and when i came back everyone was gone. luckily jo loves me. i know this because that's what her text said. and i also got some high fives.

today i comfort ate yum char and booked a trip to samoa. in your face grand duke. you're country of less than half a million will have to wait to get my hard earned cash. i'm all about tupua tamasese tuploa tufuga efi anyway.

now i'm lying on my bed trying to finish the invite to my birthday party. which fyi is going to be awesome. no thanks to the grand duke of friggen luxembourg who has stollen my party cohost. he's such a bitch.

2009-02-09T22:07:00.003+13:00

i am writing this as i sit in a central south island motel room watching csi miami. the south island is hot, mostly. we started on saturday with christchurch and rumours of another 40 degree day. which basically didn't happen. but, hey, any excuse for a sprinkler party. so we got into our togs and went nuts.

speaking of nuts, a road trip with your family is the most mental idea in history. the term over ambitious springs to mind. plus there have also been fights over the use of english. especially whether the instruction "veer right" means "turn right" or "go straight". needless to say, when your car rental company doesn't give you a map and you haven't yet bought an iphone with gps, this kind of conversation is pretty frequent. plus we haven't yet figured out the right grace period before we can make fun of this kind of hilarity. hence the near tears this morning as we were trying to get out of christchurch to head south.

on the up-side i probably get to feed wallabies tomorrow and my nephews are even more awesome the more you get to know them. plus the warehouse has cheap cds. which leads me to announce my new favourite song of all time:

barry white forever!

2009-02-05T23:19:00.002+13:00

my coworkers officially hate me because they all recommended seven pounds.

worst recommendation in years. 2/10.

it is rare for me to contemplate walking out. but i did it during seven pounds. the only thing that kept me in my seat was wondering if oprah did a cameo. the movie was right up her hutt valley. but there was no pay off and she didn't make a cameo in the end. and the only redeeming feature was that will smith has been WORKING OUT. reow.

to quote some website:

If it wasn't for Dawson's tender performance elevating Smith's game, "Seven Pounds" would be just another useless tear-jerker, wishing to speak profoundly on the misery of human existence, but failing to encourage the audience to appreciate the experience

and to quote me:

will smith is the most self indulgent good samaritan ever.

anyway, don't see it.

2009-02-02T22:05:00.003+13:00

sunday was one of the greatest days ever. my brother and i went to new zealand's golden coast to see our nephews and sister. first stop: LINDALE.

it rained. so we could only eat lunch (substandard corn fritters for me, but served with a smile so i just couldn't complain) and watch nains waste his pocket money on a coin operated tractor. btw nains continues to light up my life. he's three. he is hopeless at hide and seek. so anyway, despite the baby chickens everywhere we didn't even attempt to see the animals. instead we drove up the road to southwards.

it was memory lane! i remember first going there with either my uncle or my grandfather (some older male anyway). i must have been about five and i demanded a print of a model t ford. which i got after a lot of argument (nb: even today they are only 50cents, which makes me think it was my penny pincher grandfather that took me to southwards). i could look at the de lorean for hours.

nains was bored with the museum but just about passed out from the excitement of the elevator. my siblings and i were excited by the basement room, which is basically a memorial to every car we've ever owned. which reminds me of my new phrase that i might sell to toyota:

picture me co-rollin'.

anyway, for me the childhood memories and the joy on nain's face when it was over were worth the $10 entry fee. plus they have the best postcards in wellington. you should go.

after the museum we fed nains and tiki up on ice cream and left them to their mother. while we drove back to wellington. i played a game where i was the 91 ZM dj who does "High school hits". so i'd be all like

"high school hits, class of '97" and then play "don't look back in anger".

and so on. it might be the best road trip game of all time. you should try it.

other songs on my high school hits play list:

semi charmed life - third eye blind
santeria - sublime
every morning - sugar ray
we close our eyes - go west
misery - soul asylum
time - pink floyd
intergallactic - beastie boys

basically, the ride home from the kapiti coast is just not long enough.

anyway when i got home i bought we close our eyes on i tunes and to prove its worth, i tunes genius reminded me of this:

NEW FAVOURITE SONG OF ALL TIME.

2009-01-28T23:45:00.003+13:00

i have so much to tell you. so basically gush gush caroline and morgan got married. gush some more. it was so lovely but i have no movie to make for them. my photos were a bit lame (plus they are already on facebook) and surely by now everyone has grown weary of my talk of fascinators. of fantasisers. or whatever.

so i'll just leave it as the official 'night of 2009'. end of story.

basically, i am struggling to find anything as awesome as cazza and morgue, so i'm in to escapism. naturally, i'm back into movies in a big way. yesterday: revolutionary road. 8 out of ten but i never want to see it again. why? depressing!!! but also

it makes you crave martinis cos it turns out in the 1950s or whatever that is all that anyone drank. martinis or sherry, two ice cubes, filled to the brim.
the fashions are so great it actually hurts
you might sit next to two losers texting all their friends throughout the entire movie
kate winslet's hair might likely bother you (too blonde) and
you might end up thinking of matt damon. ew.

seriously, separated at birth or WHAT?

tonight, twilight. 7 out of ten. i've heard the criticism but frankly a hot guy deep breathing because he is overcome with desire is not such a bad thing. i am not the slightest bit freaked out by how he's a vampire. but it freaks me out that robert pattinson is like seven years younger than me and has been in harry potter movies. yet, i'd totally watch this again. and i might have to. i passed out from pain part way through due to drinking a strawberry bubble tea immediately before the movie then really really needing to pee. the strawberry bubble tea was good though.

now, we're in an economic recession if you hadn't noticed. so, if you can't afford to go to the movies just sit back and watch this. this the exact same movie our teachers used to make us watch before our annual camping trip. frankly, it is no wonder i'm a bit against the great outdoors.....

2009-01-21T23:53:00.003+13:00

this is my favourite postsecret postcard of the week. cos TOTALLY. reow.

anyway, i ordered new togs on the internet and they arrived today. i christened them at oriental bay. i looked dapper. i saw fish in the water. i bravely continued with my swim even though hello there is nothing grosser than thinking about how things live in the water i am swimming in. it brought to mind stories of that fallen hero, steve irwin. i'm constantly on the lookout for stingrays.

clearly i survived the swim. the best thing about this summer is that i haven't seen any obvious jellyfish. unlike the past two summers when they have terrorised me and compromised my ability to enjoy nature.

2009-01-15T22:18:00.002+13:00

this past weekend: what is the single biggest worry when you're hosting a party? that's right, that noone will come. i have a new way to deal with this: only semi host a party. that is let your friends hold a party at your place. if they have enough friends that you adore then you get most of the benefits of hosting a party but at the end you don't have to clean up.

monday: my landlord's wellington representative came over(thank god for the post party cleanup). she probably didn't suspect a thing, but this means that she thinks my flattie and i are alcoholics judging by the liquor bottles in our recycling this week.

tuesday: i had a hell day at work. and just wanted to go home and sleeeeeep. but the arctic monkeys were playing and i had tickets so had to go. thank god i did, cos it was a much better way to spend the evening that hitting refresh on facebook status updates. for more, read this.

wednesday: i was supposed to take annual leave. but went to work for an important meeting and took a long lunch break. i went to my new favourite city eatery. and i am so reluctant to tell you about it because i don't want everyone to go.... but i'm going to anyway: picnic. and after the walk up the hill you deserve a friggen chocolate milkshake. and maybe a breakfast burrito. but beware the birds. they've got brave, which is unfortunate because they are two wings away from being mice. and you should all know by know i equate mice with the devil.

thurday: the world sale. ie the most important fashion date on my calendar. i didn't go exactly nuts there (two tops, both awesome) but i was so jubilant that on the way back to work i accidentally bought two pairs of shoes, a clutch purse and a fascinator. can anyone say 'economic crisis'? anyway from tomorrow i'm starting my next 101 in 1001 days task: no clothes purchases for three months. i will not know what to do with my time!

2009-01-07T22:41:00.004+13:00

this is me eating my final meal of 08 as the sunset over the vines stage at rhythm and vines. it is also possibly the last photo you will ever see of me due to my lappy being retarded*.

so far 2009 has brought me acute sinusitis and a slammin' tan. but like diana ross sang, you've got to take the bitter with the sweet, right? anyway, 2009 is just kind of happening. ideally i'd take the bull by the horns and shape the year to my whim. after all, this year i plan to grow up young lady.

i've started my list of 101 things in 1001 days. and i've nearly finished one task: to send ten postcards through postcrossing. i'm only one shy. good lord i'm amazing. my life is so entirely different now from seventeen days ago when i hadn't sent a single postcrossing postcard. i now know that kolobrzeg is a place, for example.

also on my list is to save, save, save. so 2009 is going to be my year of darning socks or whatever people who save money do. so that 2010 can be the year of glorious spending. ah, glorious spending - i think i will miss you most of all.

oh, and as per i plan this year to finally become perfect. which is, afterall, what all resolutions are really about. unless you're orlando bloom. according to the classic hits summer dj orlando's resolution is to save the environment. probably single-handedly. i figure, if anyone can - its him. and 2009 is so his year.

*appendix: why my computer is retarded

i broke my camera's sd card. how is unknown, but basically i broke off the thing that locks or unlocks the card so now i can't take any more photos on it. so i bought a new one. i upgraded to a 4GB card. and guess what? MY LAPPY DOESN'T RECOGNISE IT BECAUSE IT IS TOO POWERFUL. i know i'm supposed to love the one i'm with, but seriously this is testing the relationship. big time.

2009-01-05T17:27:00.001+13:00

in case you hadn't noticed it is 2009. i rang in the new year at rhythm and vines in gisborne. read more here.

i'm sick. in bed and avoiding people and work. when i'm better, i will blog again. sigh.

2008-12-23T22:45:00.003+13:00

wow. i still remember my blogger log in. its been over a week. my memory powers are amazing.

is anyone else simply exhausted? or is it just me? whatever it is, the sound of music and pyjamas midweek sounds like the perfect cure. the fact that i will probably get presents and to see my nephews is just icing on an already sweet cake. bring on the 25th.

no kidding even seeing this on youtube makes me a bit teary it is so wonderful

plus my secret bonus gift to my family is singstar. so basically i'm the best sister ever.

also, you owe me since i'm giving you this treasure....

clearly this is amazing, but then at 1.20 POW and then at 3.34 breasts.

oh falco! you old heartbreaker.

so over the past few weeks i've done heaps that i meant to tell you about. i've:

seen high school musical three and fallen in loooove.
seen the new bond movie, quantum of solace, and fallen in looooove.
watched highlights of oprah's twenty year career as a talkshow queen.
had too many cocktails
eaten a lot of fancy food at expensive restaurants, not all of it excellent (you know who you are bisque on bolton)
lied to the people's coffee people about who i voted for in the TAWAs (although this was a genuine mistake because i (now) remember that i was torn between two options)
had a tearful farewell for one of my favourite colleagues
exprienced some highs, some lows
become the victim of credit card fraud
decorated my low key christmas grotto, and reinstated my diana queen of hearts tree
had brunch in paekakariki
listened to last christmas on my ipod about eight times
had numerous phone calls with my excited nephew who is counting sleeps until santa, and
ordered groceries on line.

the fun never stops. anyway, where are my pyjamas. i need to go into training for my traditional christmas night sound of music indulgence....

2008-12-14T09:01:00.003+13:00

booze hound alert. i can't even go to the salon without a martini.

upon drinking too many martinis i found myself sitting on the pavement in parnell. promising not to be sick but expressing doubt about my ability to get back to my hotel.

the worst part is that getting outrageously drunk and hitting on strangers was on my original 101 things to do list. but i took it off. what a sucker. i too could have been skipping around the room now doing the i-completed-a-task dance. instead i just have a lot of shame.

anyway, like anyone ashamed of drunken antics, i'm looking for things to blame. 1) no proper lunch that day (i ate half an orange poppy seed muffin which was delicious by the way) 2) i've been really busy, my body was just dog tired (and in no way drunk). and 3) food poisoning from the dinner i did have.

in retrospect though it was probably the six martinis.

on the topic of being dog tired i'm on the up and up. i'm back in to sleeping. which at the end of the day might be the most awesome hobby i have. and this week i'm spending every night in wellington. no more gisborne! no more napier! no more new plymouth! no more tauranga! no more wanganui! and the south island can just forget it. i do get to see auckland again this week, but i'm not staying over. thank god.

and also, no more martinis. at least not for a week. i'm a bit over them.

2008-12-04T22:49:00.002+13:00

so yeah. i've been busy. doing what you have been mostly: trying to find the perfect christmas cards.

christmas is basically the best. and i'm trying to sum that up in one card.

there have been a number of finalists. generally involving cats.

but at the end of the day, i don't really like cats.

but my search continues.... i am confident i will find perfection by the end of the week. and also, the environment is awesome and everything but you know what is NOT on my hot list.... e-christmas cards. please don't send me one. however, if you want a real life piece of art in the form of a card to treasure let me know your address.....

ding dong merrily on high....

2008-11-24T15:01:00.003+13:00

you know that movie key largo? or at least know of it?

well prepared to be impressed....

this is me having a 'cocktail' (okay, just soda water) at the very bar in which the movie is basically set.

also know the song kokomo by the beach boys? seriously, who doesn't. anyway, that song mentions key largo too. i am one step away from hooking in to john stamos (if you don't get the connection, watch yourself some full house already).

right now i'm in the LAX koru club waiting to board my plane home. i have been on the road for two weeks and i start work at eleven am tuesday morning (after getting in to wellington at eight am). i've decided not to think about how that will be almost impossible and instead to focus on how i've had a fantastic time away. on how miami is where the beautiful men are, and how i fell in love about eighteen times. on how i am so at home in new york now i barely need a guide book and how in boston i don't need one at all. how my new favourite song is glenn frey's you belong to the city and how this is best listened to LOUDLY as you're driving to find gators in the everglades. how i am mortally afraid of circling vultures. how i can now do the hustle with the best of them. and how i love maple syrup. and of course how i learnt a load at the conference that was my reason for coming to north america in the first place.

now i pray that i don't become afflicted with the food poisoning that is bothering my miami travel companion and that the sleeping pills work a treat. wish me luck.

2008-11-18T18:06:00.004+13:00

am i having a good time?....

i've been in NYC since saturday night. i am having such a marvellous time i'm starting to wonder whether i enjoy my own company too much.

i came to NYC to be a tourist, and it has worked. i've been overcharged for everything. although i walk through the streets with such confidence i just KNOW i look like a local. you should have seen me ordering a hot dog from a street vendor. i absolutely did not look incompetent asking for sauerkraut by just pointing to it and saying 'that stuff'. i've also had a bagel, new york cheese cake and giant pizza. aka all the important new york foods. in fact, i've eaten well - contrary to my first day in NYC where i had two fig newtons for dinner.

luckily they are basically health food (you will note the 'fat free' label).

tomorrow is my last morning and i'm trying to decide the most new york way to spend it. probably listening to some joel (new york state of mind specifically) and eating a bagel in central park. hoping i don't see any rats or similar. and hoping i don't spend another cent (NYC is an expensive city, as the taxi drivers repeatedly tell me).

2008-11-16T18:06:00.004+13:00

oh my god, i can't believe it. i've never been this far away from home....

in case you were wondering... it was awesome....

2008-11-14T16:25:00.003+13:00

oh my god brandon flowers and i are meant to be together. this confirms it....

because once at a work christmas party i lip synched to this same song. soul-mates for life.

plus he got shoutouts from kanye west on kanye's blog today. as if i needed any more evidence.

in other news i've become a reginian local. i've been asked three times today for directions.

this is how a reginian looks apparently. also, check out my new mac mascara. H.O.T.

one time it was from a guy on a bicycle. hellllloooo if you have a bicycle you're a local. transparent!

2008-11-13T10:47:00.003+13:00

when smokey sings.... i hear violins....*

holy heck the royal canadian mounted police have just the best mascots. not to mention the hottest uniforms ever. reow.

my conference starts tonight and so i've spent the day desperately trying to DO regina. which is to say, i've tried to find gift stores. i really REALLY wanted a canadian flag umbrella, but it is so bitterly cold and wet i settled for the first umbrella i found: a navy blue number from sears. i am going to use it every day while i'm away - even in miami - because you know once i get back to wellington i will never be able to use it again.

as is my travellers tradition, i went to the drug store earlier this morning. i adored it. so much to look at. it was almost like a physical blow that i could only justify buying some ibuprofen. and even that was only to relieve my headache from overstimulation.

the other highlight so far has been the maple syrup. but that was to be expected. afterall - i am in canada!

*ps i know that this isn't smokey. smokey lives in the USofA. obviously.

2008-11-10T18:53:00.004+13:00

new favourite song of all time alert.

i need music to cheer me up though. something like this....

but when i'm being less dramatic, i realise i haven't got a lot to grump about really. so what if i think i'm going to miss helen clark's dulcet tones and winston's oration. there is a reason to make like fleetwood mac and keep (thinking about tomorrow). mostly it is hottie-alert obama. i feel like i personally contributed to his victory. through will power alone. i used the power of positive thinking. i bet oprah did too. WE ARE SUCH SOUL MATES I CANNOT BELIEVE I'VE NEVER MET OPRAH.

i'm making up for it by watching lots of her 20 years of oprah dvd. number of times i've cried: three.

i've watched movies too. eg choke . i went on thursday night. 7.5/10. i've never read the book but i think it is on the 1001 list - so i REALLY must. anyway, movies about sex addicts, mental institutions and parents with dementia all add up to a good time. the very best bits were in the trailer but since i only saw that once, it didn't ruin it one iota. also i finally got to see a complete history of my sexual failures. kind of continued my sex themed movie buzz. this was a bit more uncomfortable but i'm still not sure if it is a mock or doc - umentary. and the internet is no help either. i figure the guardian reviewer had the same thoughts as me calling it an 'alleged' documentary - only he found the documentary less endearing - you can read it here. i give that a 7/10.

when i'm not losing myself in the arts, i'm indulging in fashions. i mentioned i had a new dress for the ball last week. well, i went to the ball and guess who was the belle of the ball. BINGO. it was me. god bless the l'estrange corbet dynasty. they know how to do red chiffon. but also they know how to milk the election. they had a 12.5% off day on saturday and i spent well more than i saved in preparation for looking H.O.T in new york.

oh and i'm in the koru club right now getting ready to board a plane to vancouver. RANDOM. anyway, i'm away for two weeks. first vancouver and regina (hehehe) for work then new york, boston and miami for fun and cocktails.

don't. stop. thinkin' about tomorrow. don't. stop. it'll soon be heeeeere.....

2008-11-02T21:34:00.003+13:00

i have spent a chunk of the weekend watching twenty years of oprah. i have a lot to be grateful for. the thing about oprah is we are very similar. like me, she was deeply moved by princess diana's life and her passing. and she mentions it at every opportunity. and she asks the hard questions that everyone wants to know the answers to. like how she asked lisa marie if she ever had sex with michael jackson. the answer was a surprising yes.

i've done other stuff besides watch oprah. but i can't really remember it. i'll stick to the highlights:

chris brown and rihanna at the tsb area. chris brown is cute. rihanna is beautiful. and they both know how to put on a show. i suspect a lot of training and rehersal on their parts. highlight of the night was the encore performance of umbrella, where they dueted. however, this didn't stop me wondering when either chris brown or rihanna were going to kill it like ice cube. it never happened. note to self: buy shares in supre and fake tan. this is what all the girls - and there were thousands - were wearing.
brideshead revisited. too much of the girl characters, not enough of the boy characters - but still quite a lovely relationship between sebastian and charles. 7/10
young @ heart - i cried at one point, but basically this documentary about a group of 70+ singers who reinterpret more modern songs had all the character in the world, but as a documentary it wasn't great. worth seeing just for the performances at the end. and for louie. 7/10
rain of the children - i avoided seeing this until now. the life of puhi, an 80 year old woman from tuhoe, is retraced. and it plays like a love letter from vincent ward to her, twenty eight years after her death. the movie is proof that history repeats. 9/10.
my nephews are in town. ice cream outside the zoo is my new favourite activity.
i am going to a ball on tuesday, so had to buy a new dress. think red chiffon. needless to say, i keep pulling it out of my wardrobe just to admire and pet it. i hope i am as much of a hit in real life as i am in my imagination.

2008-10-28T22:34:00.003+13:00

i got ready for snoop dogg last night and took selfportraits while i drank tea and ate toast.

totally toasted.

i've been down with snoop since the start. kind of. except i didn't know what indo' was so i never really got the lyrics to 99% of his songs. but all i really needed to know was that snoop was upside my head.

anyway, my 17 year old self would have been impressed with me last night. like how i lined up with hoodlums while they smoked and talked about their bebo pages. and how i put my motherfuckin hands up with bone thugs n harmony. who, due to the nearly hour long line to get in, had already started when we got inside the lame-o-rama tsb arena. bone thugs still killed it (to quote my new favourite stuff dot co dot nz commenter "bigg double double" who you can read here). itunes don't sell a decent version of tha crossroads so i don't have it on my NYC ipod chelsea clinton. but it repeats in my head. and we pray and we pray and we pray and we pray every day every day every day every day......

then ice cube hit the stage and he started the gansta shit 22 years ago so naturally, he killed it too. again, i am quoting bigg double double. ice cube inducted me into the west coast conference (or whatever, i was high from second hand smoke so who knows really what he inducted me in to). and my newly identified life's ambition was realised when he performed straight outta compton like it was 1989 up in the tsb arena. every moment of ice cube was magical but if pushed i'd say 'you can do it (put your back in to it)' and 'go to church' were my favourites.

at the end of ice cube's set i was about to die from dehydration so i paid five dollars for water and dreamed of sitting down. i'd been standing for hours. there are so many downsides of tsb arena (the only up-side is that i have lots of concert memories from the venue) and one of them is the lack of seating and the way the dancefloor is always sticky and gross beyond words so is not a sitting option at all.

once rehydrated, i was ready for snoop - who arrived on stage in a giant jumpsuit made of bandana material. west siiiiide. and guess what? he killed it. he played my faves (except beautiful, which is like my anthem) and even did a two song salute to tupac (rest in peace) - including one of my top ten tupac faves hail mary. basically he just sang along to a tupac tape - but it is as close as i will ever get to a tupac concert - so i thought snoop killed this too. snoop spent the rest of the night proving that there ain't no party like a snoop dogg party cos a snoop dogg party don't quit. much like snoop. who by the end of the night i was finding weirdly attractive. something i thought was impossible after seeing the disturbing sex scene in 'the wash'. although i suspect (but am happy never to find out) that his scenes in doggystyle the movie may in fact be worse.

i was ashamed for all of new zealand when the crowd disappeared straight after snoop left the stage. without so much as stomping for an encore. but i was tired so wasn't prepared to fight them. all in all it was an OUTSTANDING night. and while the sound and the venue were middling to average the show itself was awesome and i now want to marry icecube. and to the stuff gig reviewer - you need to check yo'self before you wreck yo'self. because a review that spends three paragraphs on the venue and like one on the actual concert is a C minus at best.

west siiide.

ps: tomorrow night i am going to chris brown and rihanna. i hope my shoulder injury (from arm waving) is healed by then.

2008-10-25T16:05:00.002+13:00

so there is an election coming up. well two elections kind of but only one i can vote in. i read morgan's blog about voting green. it made it clear to me that i'm a truly undecided voter. a swinger. politicians feel free to send bribes my way.

not that i'm one to respond to bribes exactly. like that time i was in melbourne with AL and we went to the italian district and while almost all of the restaurants offered us free wine and garlic breads and desserts we chose the restaurant that offered us nothing. i forget our logic. i'm not sure we had any.

anyway, the greens are impressing me with many things but NOT their lame-oh billboards. i know others have said their great, or genius or whatever. but seriously....

really?

i have views on the other parties, but i'll save it for voting day.

in other news i saw brideshead revisited. no jeremy irons. sadly. and too much of the julia character. but it was good nonetheless and i'd recommend it. 7/10.

2008-10-22T21:48:00.002+13:00

today i rocked a presentation. but also time stood still again as i noticed not everyone can rock a presentation the way i can. but then, i'm self actualised now thanks to a melbourne leadership course. so, i shouldn't judge. too much.

today i also met the evers-swindells. well sort of. i went to an award ceremony where they were giving out awards. i didn't win an award - only because i'm not eligible. you needed to be 65+. the moment my dad qualifies he is SO getting nominated.

oh and yesterday i saw brad pitt. in a movie. burn after reading. 8.5/10. it was welcome relief to see a good movie again. although other critics have used the word mediocre and been dismissive of its length, this review uses the word engaging and says 96 minutes is the perfect movie length. i would also agree with some people on the internet that it is essentially a collection of brilliant caricature character studies. and lord knows i love character studies and ensemble casts.

it is unlikely to be my movie of the week though. tomorrow brideshead revisited opens at a cinema near you. i have my gold lounge ticket all ready to go because if it is only 1/8th as good as the book and the 1981 tv series then it will probably win an oscar. i hope jeremy irons has a cameo!!!

2008-10-19T08:51:00.005+13:00

my overly sentimental aunt tells me that you learn something every day. i’ve been testing the theory. here is how i’ve gone…

monday: keira continues to be in my bad books. and she looks terrible. i know that this isn’t the popular opinion. but after seeing the duchess (4 out of 10. i liked it well enough, i guess. and it probably was better than step brothers and definitely better than the movie with the magic loom but overall it didn’t engage me and i could never care about the story) my distaste for her has been confirmed.

tuesday: it is possible for time to stand still. i know because on tuesday i went to a meeting and this actually happened. in fact, it is possible that time went in reverse.

wednesday: everything i know about project management, i learnt from google.

thursday: i can’t handle the taste or effects of absinthe. as an aside, it turns out i find pick up lines telling me i’m a creative person offensive.

friday: the drive to paekakariki on friday night can be bumper to bumper, but the company and the paekakariki fish and chips more than make up for it. i also started to read ‘from good to great’ and learn a few things about surviving in the business world. so important in these economic times.

saturday: it seems that it is true what they say about spring. all the farm animals have their babies. and piglets are cuter than you can imagine.

2008-10-12T23:07:00.001+13:00

one of the things that my one counselling session taught me was that i too often over book myself monday to friday and then spend weekends at home thinking i have no friends. but not doing anything about it. it is my form of being socially spastic.

but it doesn't happen every weekend.

this weekend was all highlights, all the time.

i should probably start with blackalicious.

fifteen out of ten. it was off the charts. or off the hook. or whatever the young kids say. i know i'm old cos i turned up two hours early for the show. but pay off! cos i also got to be pretty close to the front when blackalicious came on stage and - after getting caught literally in the middle of a fight - i heard opportunity knock and found a posie right at the front. close enough to get serenaded by gift of gab during some love song i didn't know. and at some point in the song we locked eyes and he pointed at me at the part in the lyrics where he says "you complete me" (this may not literally have been the words but it was the subtext). i have thought about it since, and i should have stayed for the after party. but if i did i probably would have hooked in to gift of gab. on the plus side he is tall and famous, on the down side i'm more into his home boy lyrics born, and i also plan to marry kanye west or simon le bon.

on saturday, i day dreamed about what my life would have been like if i'd succumbed to the obvious chemistry. but mostly i distracted myself with an art gallery tour of wellington. the dowse for craft 2.0 (and some stationery. have i mentioned i heart stationery?) and pataka for the patricia grace related exhibition.

i heart craft 2.0. but there seemed to be fewer people there this time. not that i ever notice the people really. only when they get in the way of me and notecards. the sun was a plus and there were even stalls OUTSIDE. just like a summer market.

i also heart pataka. they have a shantytown you know!!!! you must check it out. if only for the shop window display....

what the???

there is also an exhibition of photos by my favourite photographer ever. desiree dolron. check out the pataka website here for clues at how awesome she is. or deireee dolron dot com here.

being cultured is exhausting though so i had to have lots of pit stops for coffee, tea, berry crepes and fruit toast (the latter coming from the aunt daisy cafe in titahi bay, 8/10 for decor).

in the evening i went to 24hr pp. and it was awesome.

have i told you i'm so in to robert palmer right now? this outfit was loosely inspired by the simply irresistable girls. plus with a lime green bow how can you go wrong?

i had sore feet so was waiting for sux, or less good songs, but finding a chance to sit down was impossible. as i tried new dance moves (more twirls and footwork as well as some bgirl fusion - adapted from blackalicious the night before). hrc and i also got to dance with some of our favourite dancefloor celebrities as well as adopting a new friend for the evening who knew almost as many words as i do. almost. luckily the verve was played at some point and i had an excuse to leave. that point didn't come until after three sometime.

then this morning i went to the zoo zoo zoo with ryles. he was less interested in the animals than in pretending to be one. there was a heartbreakingly cute moment where he saw three otters lying in the sun and he demanded that he be put inside their enclosure so he could play with them. i could understand that. otters look like they would be wonderful to play with. he ws disappointed when i wouldn't lift him up. and when i said that if anyone was getting otter hugs it was me. but i handled the resulting tantrum the way any good aunt does. with ice cream.

then i spent the rest of the day watching dvds and trying to rest up for the working week. i watched the original (not harrison ford remake) of sabrina (7/10 overall, but 10/10 for the wardrobe and for audrey hepburn's eyebrows), and pillow talk with doris day (7.5 for the movie, 12/10 for rock hudson for being dreamy).

2008-10-09T22:59:00.003+13:00

hello, i'm a product of the paint programme. click on me if you want to see a bigger version.

i'm in dorkland. so far i have had to buy: toothpaste, socks, hairbrush, a sweater, deodorant, moisturiser and snaplock bags. because i didn't bring any of these things with me. luckily i have like nine nail polishes. sadly no nail polish remover so the nail polish collection is currently - and entirely - unusable.

i am such an excellent packer. sigh.

2008-10-06T23:46:00.002+13:00

over the weekend a colleague of mine died. heart attacks can go to hell as far as i'm concerned. i only saw him once or twice a year, but he always left an impression. usually an irreverent one. he was too young to die, basically.

his tangi is some time this week in whakatane. i think i might go. irreverence and being a warm person needs to be acknowledged.

it is hard to have follow up news to this, especially when your fingers are blistered from being the best guitar hero you can be. but i have to tell you that i saw penguins today when i was eating my lunch on the waterfront. PENGUINS. sometimes nature just gets it right.

2008-10-01T22:28:00.002+13:00

wow, said franz, sweet ride!

i am pooped. walking to lyall bay before dinner is awesome. but also it is more exhausting than watching reruns of friends. what was i thinking?

i was thinking the other day i should go and see mamma mia the stage show. given that i have seen the movie three times already and am contemplating a 4th. it is like i'm addicted to feeling good. SOS!

SOS! or rather save our credit cards. i am buying stuff on the internet like the economy isn't dying. honestly. today i nearly bought leopard print togs. actually, what stopped me. i bet they would be the greatest purchase ever. plus i'm getting a bigger after tax income due to a tax cut.

you know what i am using my tax cut money for? concert tickets. i just noticed the kaiser chiefs have sold out and i have my ticket. safely in my gmail inbox. you didn't know the kaiser chiefs were even touring? they're not. they're touring new york, dummy.

i will be in new york in a month and a half. i just go there like it ain't a thing. i'm so international. but also did i mention that i'm pooped. damn walking.

over the weekend i walked a lot. i was dog sitting charlie who is adorable but also maybe a bit horny. hence the ungodly acts with his cute little stuffed dog toy benny. anyway, me and charlie did some touring of hataitai. it was like waltzing down memory lane. hataitai is where i ate flowers and drank coke from glass bottles when i was a wee 'un. it was also where i would play my little ponies for hours on end. braiding their hair and whatnot. and playing dress ups.

i either need to do some laundry or buy some new clothes. my preference is the latter. it wont happen though. mostly because i can't imagine ever wanting to go into a wellington 'fashion' outlet ever again.

i am so bored with wellington shops. i think i need a holiday.

my summer holidays are nearly sorted. there is talk of hiring a van. to be clear: i hate driving vans. i can't imagine rocking up to rhythm and vines and impressing my future husband franz with my white budget rental cars van. but since our love is deep, i hardly think that a van will stand in the way. now i think about it.

2008-09-25T21:59:00.003+12:00

i feel like a playboy bunny that has been picked out of the mansion and now has to find a new place to live. oh, hold on .... that was a m ovie i saw tonight. 4/10.

although, i do actually feel a bit like that. tomorrow my secondment ends. and even though i have been tempted to turn to prayer to make this day come more quickly, tonight i got yelled at over the phone because obviously i'm on call 24/7 and it made me feel a little retarded and like i needed to stick around to redeem myself. plus i got a present and a card so sweet that made me want to cry. being kicked out of the mansion is making me all emotional.

don't cry for me though. because i'm making plans to go to miami in november. to art deco it up with the cuban hotties and hulk hogan.

hello all you hulkamaniacs out there. are you living by the three demandments? if not i'm gonna bring my atomic leg drop and make you hurt just like you were rowdy roddy piper and it was 1989 all over again.

actually, that picture of hulk has helped no end. i'm down right chirpy again. which hopefully means i'm ready to start on my ambitious craft project: making a dress out of my business cards. if it takes more than ten minutes though i cannot guarantee it will hold my attention. wish me luck.

2008-09-21T22:16:00.002+12:00

after a whiskey tasting at crazy horse steak house earlier this week, i'm all about soda water. i can NOT get enough of the stuff. add some lime for a virgin cocktail. or on the rocks. it is ALL GOOD. plus it turns out it is an adequate substitute for dutch courage. as it was enough to get me up debuting at blue note with a duet version of manic monday. it involved literal dance moves. obviously. and i'd, humbly, suggest it was life changing for the audience.
the song resonates.

as does ally mcbeal....

i don't know what i like more about ally mcbeal season one: the vonda sheppard soundtrack, the "fashions" or hating on billy. seriously, it is a three way tie.

today i watched the first six episodes of ally mcbeal. while each was brilliant in its own right, highlights included: ally telling a fat man to stop looking for the one and to settle for the only, ally stealing "sex jelly" from the supermarket and elaine trying to market the face bra. and jon bonjovi hasn't even joined the cast yet. i have some fun times ahead of me!!!!

2008-09-18T22:46:00.002+12:00

is there anything cuter than a 19 year old rapper? thank god i got tickets to chris brown and rihanna. i also got tickets today to see blackalicious. remember how in the final years of university i was all about the hip and the hop? well finally the bands are touring here. i knew if i held out long enough they would.

so now i'm pulling out my gift of gab records and practicing my bgirl moves. october is going to go off!

2008-09-14T07:56:00.003+12:00

how come i've never read a confederacy of dunces before? don't worry though. i am making up for the oversight by reading it obsessively.

and as a result i'm progressing nicely on the 1001 books to read before you die challenge. i may have even caught up to the one book a month target after i finally finished the motivation sapping eva trout, and read the delightful miss peddigrew lives a day.

this week has been fierce. some weeks are. a election has been called, which of course is a highlight. for the first time in years i'm interested. i think the last time i was five and i wrote a story about how my mother was going to vote for david lange. my school principal gave me a smiley face stamp on my hand for that one. i have also voted in the stv vs fpp city council poll. i'm such a citizen right now.

i also did some dancing at a ball on friday night, which is perhaps the real reason i spent yesterday reading confederacy of dunces and not going to atomic. ie i needed to recover. the ball itself was fine, but low key. i wore sixty dollars of equip jewels and pulled out my disco moves once again. turns out i actually prefer dancing by myself though, so i kept moving away from my partners so i could twirl alone. anyway after the ball i drank whiskey in the holiday inn hotel lobby until two am while some soccer team ate sandwiches. as an aside, they weren't as hot as i had anticipated.

i also got pretty cultured this week. i went to see the rita angus exhibition at te papa. seeing the island bay boats in real life, and not in a faded poster in someone's living room, was like a pilgrimage for my island bay bred self. and like most great art works, it was smaller in real life. but still fierce. that same night i ate coq au vin at hippotamus. food was like a 9 out of ten. views were great. but music was random and i think the glass food by the entrance could do with a dusting. anyway, i'll be back. i also ate at plate at the holiday inn. food was pretty good. maybe a seven and a half. and i ate at the koru club and about a hundred times at my work cafe. i also went to dorkland this week. for all of about two hours.

this week i also have two new favourite songs. one is mase's feel so good. and the other is this one.

i thought i hated this song because it was on a grey's anatomy like that terrible song. how to save a life. by the fray. but then this weekend i listened to it again and decided actually it is the greatest song of all time.

anyway, i can't believe i have spent this long not reading confederacy. better get back in to it...

2008-09-07T22:54:00.005+12:00

the problem i have with weekends is that they go by too quickly. one minute you're downing whiskey at te papa, the next you're trying to figure out if you have enough clean clothes to last the week while sobbing about dogs thanks to post secret.

i would insert a new self portrait here, but the lord alone knows where my camera is. i had it when i got back from melbourne but since then it has been awol. anyway, an old portrait will have to suffice....

remember this face because it could be on the front page of the paper on monday. actually, i'll be hurt if it is not. a dompost photographer took my photo at the book fair on saturday. and sure, the only bad publicity is no publicity or whatever, but seriously: i was reading the sensuous woman by "j" at the time. plus i am sure the photographer didn't get my best angle. pretty much i'm the only person alive who can do that.

on the topic of the sensuous woman, i bought it obviously. it is awesome, and has already paid for itself . i spent nearly an hour an a half in hysterics with AL reading it at felix while eating ginger loaf. you really must read it. topics covered include when it is okay not to wear makeup (never, unless you have a conservative surgeon in which case there is one exception: surgery), eleven orgie etiquette tips (did you know, you might need to be naked? this book is a godsend), and the hazards of sex (vd mostly, in which case "cry 'help' to the doctor and 'murder' to the man who gave it to you - but don't let those nosy neighbours hear you. the day hasn't quite arrived when venereal diseases are something to brag about").

i also got lucky man, the keith quinn story for my brother. he was stoked. naturally.

from one lucky man to another: do you know who my new favourite celebrity is? tom cruise.

that man has had some bad press (which i now understand after my brush with the dompost as per above), but has made lemonade with his role in tropic thunder. i give the movie 7.5. the best bits were the bells and whistles (the trailers at the start and the cameos throughout). so the movie and its plot were probably kind of weak. but who noticed? i was too busy watching tom cruise shake his money maker to ludacris. which brings me to my new favourite song: get back. anyway, robert downey junior was wonderful - as per my expectations. and jack black once again wasn't annoying. maybe i was too hasty to judge jack black after nacho libre. although one search on youtube reminds me i was on the money with that one. and lance romance, everyone's third favourite n*sync member made an appearance. but enough said. i do not want to spoil the cinematic experience.

and on the topic of spoiling, i'm about to spoil my sunday with more laundry.... sigh.

2008-09-06T02:26:00.002+12:00

the problem with having a night on the town with a different group than you're used to is that you end up listening to disco music and holding hands with some random boy.

and it doesn't look this cute either. but his dancing was below par and i was hungry so i escaped to kenny's cafe for a cheese burger. it was gross, obviously, but also entirely delicious. and now i'm lying in bed trying to digest it while watching sarah palin vlogs. the US presidential election is the new olympics. in other words, i'm obsessed.

2008-09-03T22:53:00.003+12:00

i am pretty good to you. i've written to you five hundred times. exactly. to celebrate i'm writing a list of five hundred reasons why i'm awesome.

kidding.

but if you want to, who am i to stop you from writing comments to that effect?

my most used label is about being an aunt and to celebrate i gift you a moment of adorable.

you're welcome.

2008-08-31T14:58:00.003+12:00

you should probably know i love personality tests. which is why going to melbourne last week was my best australian holiday ever. it started with shopping. then moved to cocktails and ended in three days of personality tests, 360 reviews and counselling.

here i am drinking a mint julep. not in savannah, but at the meat and wine company - melbourne, while watching a couple give eachother foot rubs IN PUBLIC like it wasn't a thing. for me, it WAS a thing and i could barely cope with the mad case of the giggles it was giving me.

i am resisting being self disclosing about the course, even though it was so awesome it is basically all i can think about. it confirmed i'm an infp. so i feel confident that i can accomplish great and wonderful things. however there is a questionmark over how this combines with the fact i'm a fire sign. jung and astrology seem fairly similar if you ask me. ie both are right on the money.

and at the course i fine dined, and got to wake up to this view every morning, before walking along the beach (for like five minutes, this was self discovery not a health spa).

since returning home i've been in a bit of a haze. mostly because all i want to do is talk about the course. i keep recommending it to people, and analysing their problems. i'm like an evangelist. which is why i urge you to do it too. but if you don't have a spare five thousand dollars or whatever it costs to do this professionally, take the free internet test here.

i have also dedicated time to finding new places for my ikea presents to myself. it turns out i didn't really need that third duvet cover. oh well - i bought that before i was self actualised. so it doesn't count. oh and i went to see the tempest at toi whakaari. i don't do shakespeare without claire danes so it wasn't my cup of tea. plus it was too avante guarde for my tastes. but it was enjoyable overall plus gave me the sense of being cultured. bonus.

speaking of being cultured i need to stop writing now and go and work on my 1001 books to read before you die. months ago i declared i'd read one a month. that hasn't happened. i've only read one - fear and trembling. but am close to finishing a second - eva trout - which despite all the summaries making it sound like the perfect book for me is actually duller than you could imagine. i do not recommend it.

2008-08-25T09:49:00.004+12:00

i am in melbourne about to be professionally developed. i had to fill out a form about why i am here. luckily they had the option of "i wanted to get away and experience new things". ie shopping at IKEA.

IKEA was both better and worse than i imagined. because of course i'd never been. i will have real difficulities getting my suitcase packed with all the ribba photoframes i bought. my companion thought they could fit a whole table in their suitcase. luckily we were such novices we didn't understand the writing down the numbers for aisle etc... so we couldn't find it.

right now i'm about to be called for breakfast. this place has twenty four hour cakes. so why would i ever need cereal i wonder? oh well, this is the price of being professional.

2008-08-21T23:48:00.003+12:00

i've seen more movies. i'm probably what you would call an addict. i mean how else can you explain how i saw wanted. oh hold on, there was an explanation: james mcavoy.

"hello. i am james mcavoy and i'm in the narnia movie and am TOO adorable for words"

he is not adorable in wanted, however. he is just lame. like a lame edward norton. because the only good bits made me think of fight club (evidence: mention of ikea products, dreary every day life etc...). the bad bits made me think of leaving the theatre. and the really bad parts made me laugh out loud. basically, if you can believe a guild of weavers can become assassins driven by a magic loom, then this is the movie for you. minus eight. it would have only been a minus 5, but i found out i missed out on the gymnastics showcase at the olympics by going to the movie. so it gets minus 3 opportunity cost points.

and i have also just this moment seen baby mama. and by comparison it is oscar worthy. and it has an all star cast that includes steve martin. that guy is ALWAYS hilarious. plus it is a chick flick so even when it is bad it is good. and there are babies and jokes about wanting babies and tina fey and i should probably become best friends because when she is given the chance to dj at a night club she blasts out the lady in red. which we know is the best song of all time. sadly, it empties the dance floor. 6/10.

2008-08-19T22:49:00.002+12:00

if you want help being massively unpopular in your office, i've got it.

everytime something goes wrong you simply say:

"this is such a drysdale".

then refuse to watch the olympics because you're sick of seeing new zealanders pull a drysdale.

and then start to refer to bronze medal winners as a bunch of drysdales.

____

today was my best day at work for the longest time. we watched bevan doherty pull a drysdale and get a bronze on the big screen tele. and i got to launch four documentaries, which i had planted the seeds for with my exceptional imagination(they are obviously work documentaries, don't get too excited), i booked alicia keys tickets (i hear you say why? but the question should really be why not?) and i had cornflakes and watties fruit salad for breakfast at the documentary launch. oh, and i kept the wheels of democracy turning and what not.

but then i get home and discover my broadband limit has been BLOWN for the month.

in other words i've done a drysdale*.

*bloody tvnz live streaming of men's gymnastics has been nothing but bad news. in short, and despite the way it is all i can talk about, i can't wait until the bloody olympics are over.

2008-08-17T23:29:00.003+12:00

so i don't sleep these days.

i was worried it was my sleeping conditions. after confirming my dream catcher was in place i decided to make my bed properly and see if that helped.

it didn't.

so obviously i decided i needed to buy new bed linen. tonight is the real test run... fingers crossed.

the good news is that i have the olympics to keep me company into the wee small hours. and now that nu zild success has made me proud to be a k1w1 i'm obsessed. i have such a crush on valerie vili i can *not* get enough of her walking around the bird's nest with the flag draped all over her winning self. and thanks to the wonders of the internet i can watch it any time i please.

you know what else i watch any time i please (provided i can go to a cinema and pay my hard earned cash for a ticket)? mamma mia. i saw it again. it was as - if not more - awesome than i remember. pierce brosnan's return to his remington steele form was long awaited but TOTALLY WORTH IT. actually, who needs sleep when you can watch this clip over, and over, and over, and over again?

2008-08-15T23:26:00.002+12:00

it could have been the whiskey, or the apple pie dinner. whatever it was, my taxi ride home tonight was poignant.

the taxi driver kept changing radio stations. probably to find a song that he thought i'd like.

bingo. big time.

2008-08-11T23:20:00.003+12:00

cliche alert. male gymnastics is so beautiful it makes me want to cry.

god bless the olympics. even if 90% of it is duller than watching paint dry.

so far i haven't caught any male gymnastics on the tvnz coverage. due to their preference for the paint drying sports: cycling, soccer, hockey, god forsaken equestrian. that kind of thing. so i've resorted to reliving my favourite olympic moments through youtube. like this...

ps only watch the first minute of this. the rest is some other gymnasts. why bother?

the benefit of watching clips on youtube is that i can watch them in bed with my electric blanket. you may not have noticed but it is positively siberian round here these days. on saturday i thought i had pneumonia because i just couldn't get warm. then i realised it was my three fin heater and eighty year old flat conspiring against me. so i bought a new heater. and spent my nights dreaming of insulation and heat pumps.

anyway, back to alexei nemov. in 1996, when new zealand had danyon fever, i thought i would die if i never met alexei. surprisingly, i'm still alive. and now he has retired and lost some of his gymnasts physique. i'd still go there though. obv. (but not in a million years for danyon. again, obv. it was the dancing with the stars that took that one over the edge).

then in 2000 i couldn't believe he was in my hemisphere. again, i vowed death a better alternative to never meeting him. as per above, i'm still alive. despite vanessa amorosi doing her best to kill me with her 'absolutely everybody' song. ps only click that link if you are desperate to remember what song i'm talking about. you will only last like three seconds. i promise you.

but by 2004 i was a professional and didn't have time to sit around all day watching the olympics. i worked hard for my money. and plus didn't want my cowoes to know about my obsession. but still, i booed with the crowd when alexei wasn't given a high enough score by judges. i also continued my fantasy where i would marry alexei. as yet this hasn't come true. plus the athens olympics were the dullest yet. i can't remember a single other moment.

this time round all i have is other moments. due to no alexei. and no male gymnastics for me so far. only godforsaken equestrian.

2008-08-06T22:02:00.005+12:00

most mornings getting up is my enemy. and my enemy wins every friggen day. i resist though. which is why three mornings in a row i've had less than ten minutes to get on all my clothes for the day (which usually takes minimum two attempts anyway due to me being indecisive), pack my bag, make school lunch and find a matching headband or ribbon.

somethings gotta give, and recently that has meant buying my lunch and forgetting to put stuff in my bag.

the ribbon is a non negotiable.

part of why i am so late in the morning is i'm afraid of ghosts these days. thanks film festival! i saw the orphanage. it was horrible. i hated every moment of it. i can't write about it because it is night time and my heart is racing just thinking about thinking about it. gross. anyway it was probably well done. who knows, i watched it through gaps in my fingers. 0/10.

in contrast i completely relished the order of myths. about mardi gras in mobile alabama. with its pomp, ceremony and racism. it was both loving and shocking and made me wish that i had a box of moon pies to eat. due to the numerous poems from mobile, alabama's school chidlren about the wonders of moon pies and how they were like pillows of marshmallow and pools of chocolate fudge sauce. sadly, after extensive internet research, i discover they are basically mallowpuffs. btw when you google mallowpuff and griffins one of the top few sites you come across is this. anyway, order of myths 8.5/10.

i have seen two other movies recently too, thanks to cpw's internet smarts. the first is charlie bartlett, where i fell in love with a character actor in a supporting role, playing the thug. tyler hilton. hopefully not of the hotel hiltons. anyway the movie was more endearing than the trailer would have you believe. 8/10.

and last night i saw teeth. DISTURB. seriously. poster child for chastity discovers she has vagina dentata. hilarity ensues. well, more like terror and severed penises. all tastefully done of course. 8.5/10. it got minus point five for having the freaky guy from nip tuck in it. this is the second time i've seen him in a role that required his penis being cut up. hmm...

2008-08-03T12:21:00.002+12:00

call me leonard maltin. actually, don't. but basically all i do these days is work and go to movies. especially now that i have grown weary of lol dogs.

the good thing about movies in general is that you get to sit in a dark room with your phone off.

movies i've seen since my last post:

1. hancock.

i deviated from my diet of film festival movies for hancock. watercooler gossip was that the movie was only 60% good. watercooler gossip was right. it was worth the ticket price just to have missed late night phone calls. plus that first 60% was great. although that could have been the two for one (or as it turned out four for one) cocktails at chow beforehand. also there is debate about whether buff will smith or skinny big ears will smith is hotter. i go for buff. 6/10

2. the wave

i vaguely remember hearing about the book at school. from our third form science teacher. the one who rewarded me with a mars bar for memorising some sort of table. it was my scientific life highlight. anyhoo, i wasn't sure exactly what to expect in this movie. and the 'facist' film society member who forced me to take the worst seat in the house put me off the movie from the get go. but overall it was good. by the end i (a) was in shock and (b) surprised i couldn't speak perfect (or in fact any) german. i couldn't sympathise with the female lead, even though she was the 'voice of reason', which was the nail in the coffin of this movie though. 7/10 or at at strech 7.5 / 10. no robin hood in other words.

3. anvil! the story of anvil.

remember that rockin' canadian band anvil? and how they rocked 1984? neither. mostly because 1984 was all about beat it and the ghostbusters themesong.

anyway, two men who do remember how anvil rocked 1984 are lead singer lips and drummer robb reiner. and like in that song, they're rockin' the suburbs. when they're not delivering hot lunches to local schools. the movie was billed as a real life this is spinal tap. and kind of it was. but it was much sadder. by the end i wanted to cry. but it was good. 8/10 easy. i would have given more if robb's wife and her 1980s hair had more screen time.

4. i think we're alone now.

fast forward to 1988 and you know what was rocking my tape deck?... tiffany. i am not alone in this. obviously. and a friend of mine got to see her in real life and TOUCHED HER HAND at a concert in london not that long ago. and so obviously tiffany and i have a real connection.

this documentary is proof i'm drawn to the aspergic. as i found out about two of tiffany's hardcore followers. the first guy is so much of a hardcore follower he got mentioned on the e true hollywood story: tiffany that was on c4 a few weeks ago. he's the aspergic one. by the end of the doco i felt kind of up beat about him. he's going to get married in the next ten years, probably to alyssa milano. he has prospects. kelly, the intersex fan is in less good of a situation. but then, i've just stalked her youtube page and am thinking maybe i'm being too patronising with my pity. not enough actual tiffany, but totally gripping. 8/10.

2008-07-29T22:00:00.003+12:00

i just got home from work. it is late. i'm lying, dressed corporate, on my trash heap. aka my bed. reading lol dogs.

the dogs are my only joy.

i think i need a maid.....

2008-07-27T21:57:00.002+12:00

here are this weekend's headlines

JACK BLACK NOT ANNOYING IN A MOVIE

i went to see jack black, star of the 'awesome' 'movie' nacho libre, and mos def be adorable in be kind rewind. i got tickets thanks to an influenza and pneumonia cocktail keeping the e-i-d in bed and away from the cinema. lucky me. 10/10 for the ghostbusters and rush hour 2 remakes. but, despite everyone in the theatre being in love with the movie as far as i could tell, i grew weary of the moments that weren't the remakes. 7/10. also, their website lets you swede the covers of movies. i did lotr (as viggo's character, whatshisname) and wedding singer as adam sandler.

ERROL FLYNN A HEARTTHROB

so, after a good night's sleep and a coffee from mojo on kent terrace that took about three years to make, i went to see errol flynn steal the show in the adventures of robin hood. reow. best film in the festival to date. and even though i think he was a dirty smoker, i'd go there. 9/10.

CHAMPAGNE COCKTAILS MAKE YOU DANCE BETTER

throw peach schnapps in a champagne flute, pour over some lindauer and just TRY and stop me finding ricky martin in your collection.

remember how i was in hollywood and actually SAW ricky get his star on the walk of fame. as in i was there basically when this photo was taken. ah, memories. like the corner of my mind.

i was shaking my bon bon in my $14 savemart dress. like miss thing. i am dreading the photos, but at the time i thought i was absolutely charming. and coordinated. plus, in some ways dancing was the only option because it was about minus one thousand degrees last night. i blessed my electric blanket when i got home and had a religious moment as i got to enjoy a preheated bed.

BOY GETS GIRL THEN LOSES GIRL

my final film of the weekend, billy the kid. a documentary about billy, who is unique but tries not to let it go to his head. he falls in love, gets his heart broken, and tells us about his family. also he is a purple belt and is enchanting. 7.5/10 for the doco. 10/10 for billy being awesome (you can read a bit more about it here, and fyi billy is an actual movie star as well) and 20/10 for billy's mother and her metallica tshirt (note i love both equally, and cannot find an internet image of either to save my life.

2008-07-24T23:30:00.005+12:00

surprise surprise. christian bale is hot as batman. and heath ledger is a loss to not only to hollywood, but to me. 15/10.

plus i cinelounged it up with free popcorn and seats bigger than my sofa. and i escaped work early. afterwards i baked cupcakes. basically, batman might be tthe greatest movie ever*.

*clearly this statement is not true. for so many reasons. but it might have been more true if there was one addition: danny devito as the penguin. best batman character and actor match ever.

2008-07-22T23:22:00.002+12:00

i'm looking for a catholic to marry. because i want to get married here.

today i had cause to go to st mary of the angels on boulcott st. my thoughts of a wedding venue were unfortunate. because today was maureen's funeral. maureen was a contemporary of my grandparents. they all grew up together in aro valley. holloway road really. back in the late 20s. and early 30s. when my grandmother would walk to the basin reserve and back after dinner because hello: they didn't have gossip girls to watch. and my grandfather was probably an awkward young man. tall and, if the dimentia years are anything to go by, inappropriate. it was a different age.

maureen outlived my grandparents by many years. and would tell me which traits i'd picked up from my ancestors. curly hair mostly. although i'd beg to differ. my grandmother's hair was wavy. not curly. and my grandfather was all about the brylcreem so who'd know. she also used to give me a crisp dollar to buy icecreams for my brother and sister after visits. and hers was the only house i'd accept a glass of milk instead of raro. because it went so well with her date scones. which were quite possibly the best date scones of all time. they probably had lard in them. or crack.

plus she had the best dolls of all time in her bedroom and as a child i would be allowed to look (but not touch) as they lay in their immaculate outfits in their cots ]. and she decorated her home, which she shared with her brother, and before that her father, in photos, cards and crocheted rugs. a powerful design aesthetic.

maureen cared about us because of her dedication to my grandparents. which is how she felt about nearly every family who ever lived nearby. patel's superette got special mention at her funeral. which kind of summed it up for me.

she was heading for ninety. and she had a happy life with her family. so, unlike recent other funerals, it didn't feel tragic. it seemed sad but natural to say goodbye.

so i said goodbye. observed the communion and mouthed the lord's prayer. and went back to work sombre. and a bit cloudy headed. but with a new top (there is a sale at stable if you're feeling like a millonaire or if you're just feeling sad) and thinking of how my high school principal was (shockingly) right. friendships of your adolescence can last a lifetime.

2008-07-22T00:16:00.003+12:00

so even though i knew i was going to a movie billed as csi:reykjavik in my head i imagined jarhead and jake.

instead i got a movie that made me feel cold and that took me through the murder of this shady character who may or may not have been a rapist in the 1970s but who definitely had some kind of genetic defect.

obviously, i'm totally spontaneous. as was my decision to see jar city tonight.

it was a good decision. 7.5/10. it would have scored higher but for the scenes with rats and sheep.

also, as an aside, i felt like chocolate pudding tonight too. so went to strawberry fare. it reminded me of being fifteen. except that unlike 1995 the place was empty. luckily some things never change, like the menu. the berry drenched chocolate pudding was just what i wanted. and the service was prompt and polite. 8/10.

2008-07-20T21:53:00.004+12:00

everything you ever needed to know about me...

unexpectedly, my electric blanket has competition. there is a new blanket it town thanks to craft 2.0. pictured here. on my lap. it is green on the outside and brown on the inside. i've folded it over in this picture so you get to see both sides AT ONCE.

actually, dwell on this picture. because it contains just about everything you need to know about me.

1) i have at least two awesome blankets
2) i check facebook too often
3) i have the world's ugliest cellphone
4) chelsea clinton, my nyc ipod, is never far from me
5) i have hello kitty stickers on my lappy (aka tupac shakur)
6) i like pillows
7) i went to atomic last night and it was friggen aces. this one is implied by the photo because it was taken at like 9pm and i have already retired to my room for the evening due to physical exhaustion
8) i bought my bed in the late 1990s. i LOVE the wooden frame
9) i washed my hair this weekend. hence the slammin' curls

---------

part II: c4 uchoose40 voters are retarded.

c4uchouse40 voters are retarded because for (at least) a second time they have voted aerosmith's asteroid song number 1. OF ALL TIME. i watched the first few songs and she's like the wind was like number 38.

outrage!

so anyway, this weak segue leads to how i went to a movie in the wellington film festival today. hold me tight, let me go. at the unfortunate time of 10.45. unfortunate because today is a sunday. and i didn't get home until around 4. AM. and then i watched some gossip girl. i'm an addict.

for a proper review of the movie go here. basically it is a doco about 40 or so kids with behavioural problems brought about by severe emotional trauma who go to a boarding school. it is a window into their world. their world is pretty sux. i cried. 8/10. but the film festival internet ticket sales 0/10. i got a lame oh seat to the very side at the paramovnt even though i booked on the third day that tickets were available and even though the theatre was on the empty side. sure, my mum never stabbed my dad so in the scheme of things: no big deal. but it is the type of incompetence that after four hours sleep i really did not have the patience for. so i talked about how stoopid it was at volume while the lights dimmed. IN YOUR FACE FILM FESTIVAL INTERNET TICKET SALES.

2008-07-16T22:51:00.003+12:00

some days i just sit around and think about ray liotta. and how one time he was in an awesome movie called corrina, corrina. the one with whoopie goldberg and the ever delightful tina majorino. i say she's ever delightful because it is true. one glance at napoleon dynamite and you'd be with me.

anyway tina majorino is the link in this chain. because she has been on big love. and so has amanda sayfried. and amanda sayfried is in the best movie since high school musical hit the small screen....

mamma mia.

basically you should see it. because it is awesome (10/10). but if i have to make the appeal that bit sweeter i'd say pierce brosnan pulls off the white pant look and plays his role with conviction. and colin firth gets his kit off. sort of. amanda sayfried though, is bland and maybe 12 years old. plus she's offended the gays. to quote someone quoted on imdb " A source tells the publication, "Outrageous! How can (Seyfried) diss (disrespect) the gays like that? This is our movie!"". tut tut.

i saw it at the embassy. where i nearly got a nose bleed from the shitty seats even though almost noone was there. then i ate pizza at one red dog (the place never changes, 6.5/10)and caught and environmentally taxi home. great night out. i wonder what ray liotta was doing tonight? is he in a csi spinoff yet. that man was MADE for that kind of role.

2008-07-13T23:40:00.004+12:00

first up someone needs to step the frick off. click here to be shocked at how someone has taken my name. i watched some videos of her 'comedy'. and yeah, i'm funnier.

second, i went to a party on saturday where i promised to pimp out my readers to a newish blog. there were cupcakes involved so i hadn't power to say no. not that i would have declined anyway cos the blog is awesome. basically it is a girlish site, that tests products, tells you where the freebies are likely to be and links pictures of magnum pi birthday cakes. the first five people to go there from this site AND LEAVE A COMMENT on both homeperm and prettyprettyprettydotcom gets a prize from me. the prize may not be terribly exciting. but then again, it could be a million dollars*. and a prize is a prize. the link is here.

actually, do five people read this blog? i know i check it nearly five times a day, but that is only one reader. and if i'm the only contributor that probably doesn't count. right?

anyway, back to the prettyprettypretty party - i got to wear my pyjamas and sing spandau ballet's true on singstar. it could have been the signature cocktails, or maybe the whisky, but i was good. in fact, to quote spandau themselves, i was GOLD. i knew memorising the words fanatically would pay off. and frankly, for me it was the jackpot. sadly, i hadn't put the same leg work into funky cold medina. and it showed.

but back to jackpots... world is in sale mode. and, to celebrate, i broke my vow to go three months without buying new clothes. but they really do have the best sales. 50% off. so the bigger crime would have been keeping to my challenge and not buying anything. and apparently they have a $50 sales rack now. so bargain city basically. the world sale is my favourite fashion event of the year and inspires a sort of breathlessness. like i might actually resort to violence if i see someone take the last of something in my size. i'm like the blue rinse set at the kirks sale.

oh yeah, and while i'm linking all over the show. go here. this american dude has started blogging again. and i'm overjoyed.

anyway, i should stop writing. it is late and i have gossip girl to watch. and season 4 of 90210. it is all coming up homeperm (and by that i don't mean andi smith, wisconsin comic).

*obviously, it is not a million dollars

2008-07-07T22:55:00.005+12:00

holy crap life is good.

and by life i mean the internet.

exhibit a: super gran.

exhibit b: t bag and the revenge of the t set.

exhibit c: contact

i could literally go on and on and on. but i won't. because i'm too busy peeing my pants from excitement.

2008-07-06T21:20:00.003+12:00

that gorilla from my last post continues to be hilarious. i have become the most frequent visitor to my own blog. just to get my three times a day dose of the gorilla going phil collins on the drums. i might get fired for excessive internet use at work.

speaking of work, i wore a suit this weekend. which is almost as hilarious as the gorilla given that i refuse to wear suits at work. i went to a hospital themed party as a bureaucrat. complete with post it notes and red tape. and a great opening line for any hot doctors i came across. something about tying them up in red tape for months. anyway, i didn't use it.

i did get stabbed in the head though.

today i went to see shetland ponies at the most awesome museum slash farm slash cafe that i've ever been to in my life. just to be clear i am only linking it so that you know for sure that YOU ARE NEVER ALLOWED TO GO THERE WITHOUT ME BECAUSE I WOULD DIE OF JEALOUSY. we went there for ryles's birthday. that's right: the most choice two year old just became the most choice three year old. his treat was going to see the model railway and feeding the shetland ponies. but he was more interested in pretending the disability access toilet cubicle was a spaceship. we ate chocolate mud cake too.

and by the way i can't believe ryles is three. because it seems like just yesterday i was in the hospital arguing with nurses and worrying about the pipe things coming out of his teeny tiny nose.
and now he's singing happy birthday and blowing out three candles without any help. he's such a show off.

2008-07-02T22:34:00.003+12:00

this ad helps me to remember my spirit.

it also helps me to remember phil collins who is hilarious on every level.

tonight i watched tele. it was awesome. i began my night, however, with panic calls to people at work and a reception for all blacks at parliament. but because of the already mentioned phone calls i arrived at the all blacks party late and as a result have not started a high profile affair with a sports star. rugby players are dull and not actually that attractive. but if i want a husband before i'm thirty i really have to keep my eye on the prize.

dejected, i went home via cafe laz for a chicken iskender. take away. which was brilliant as always. plus i convinced myself that with the beetroot and carrot and all that it was health food. so i got baklava as well. i also needed the sweet relief of baklava to help me get over the fact that saigon cafe is no more. no more walking down memory lane vietnamese style in newtown. just as well newtown new world sell 59 cent packets of pho noodles. in the international food section. chicken is the best.

plus i'd timed my return home just in time for PRIME ROCKS ELTON JOHN. which was the craziest doco ever. because of the way it told me nothing and involved lots of whizzy effects where a clip art rocket was flown over vegas and where freddy mercury and all of elton's famous 'friends' joined him on stage. but it brought to mind the elton john concert where i nearly got into a fight over my backpack and where some woman couldn't deal with how i can sing 'i guess that's why they call it the blues' like noone is listening.

then i messed around, watching more tele, and GREAT GORILLA ADS, before the euphoria of my electric blanket. which of course reminds me of the other way i remember my spirit... through sleep.

2008-06-29T21:40:00.004+12:00

too tired to be original, i'll begin by repeating my facebook status update... "[i] can't remember being warm". i am being quite literal.

i am in bed because i once watched a movie at school on the evils of tramping and the voiceover said that if you were getting hypothermic you should get in your sleeping bag. i figure getting in to bed with your electric blanket on full would be the same thing. but actually as i type i am wondering if i will get frostbite on my fingers. plus even with the trusty leckie blankie, and thermals, i wouldn't say that i was warm exactly.

you know who else has been cold? ernest henry shackleton.

hello, i'm sir ernest henry shackleton. trying to cross the antarctic on foot was COLD.

i know this because i've seen an episode of shackleton the tv show. he and i have another thing in common too - we are both explorers. for shackleton, it was polar exploration. for me, it is the following....

board games. this week i played settlers with the ships and something or other extender pack. not all explorations are successful, but like shackleton it is how i recover that sets me apart from my peers. in other words, i lost big time. but i'll bounce back.
parties. i went to the matariki ball at te papa on friday night. if you went to law school with me you were probably there. everyone else was. it was a bit lame though. so the big discovery was it isn't only in highschool where balls fail to deliver.
baked potatoes at midnight espresso. friggen delicious, even if at the time i was disappointed because i wanted them to reopen the kitchen to make me a ham, cheese and onion toasted sandwich.
dancing to interpol. so, yeah, i've done this before. but at 24 hour party people on saturday night i may have even beaten my own record of awesomeness in interpol dancing. also i co-discovered the new best male dancer at 24hrpp... yellow pants. that's our nickname for him anyway. as john travolta to disco, so yellow pants to brit pop. basically.
pineapple fritters and red bean jelly at dragons yum char. both were too sweet. but both were new and exciting. dragons yum char was just so efficiently run too. apart from no mango jelly it was the near perfect 24hrpp recovery breakfast.
bagladeshi cinema. i went to see bricklane tonight. so sure, it was from the UK, but you get what i mean. i needed to go to the bathroom from half way through. which may have reduced my enjoyment somewhat. pretty good. maybe 6/10. if slow moving pieces that make comment on the crazy times post 9-11 this could be your cup of tea so you'd probably rate it higher. what stopped me rating it higher was the weird flashbacks and arty shots and not enough screen time for the younger male lead REOW.

see, shackleton and me, not too dissimilar. and actually, after starting with my facebook status, i now might have to end by changing my facebook status line. because i'm starting to defrost and i no longer fear frost bite. i knew the leckie blanket wouldn't let me down. i'm sorry i ever doubted it.

2008-06-22T21:25:00.005+12:00

from third to sixth form i was like this economics genius. but i pretended i didn't care. at fifteen, people who care a lot are vile. now too, i guess. unless it is me being a care bear.

in 7th form i dropped economics for calculus and a low grade.

anyway, thanks to my economics pedigree, i know all about demand and supply charts and opportunity cost. which is how i figure i could have watched a whole disc of who's the boss series one instead of going to work today.

who's the boss is my new obsession obviously. it makes me feel the way i felt when i watched four seasons of cheers in like three weeks. in short, wonderful. so how work won the battle for my time today beats me.

if we pretend my sunday afternoon at work didn't happen, this weekend has been all about family. the bower/micelli blended family obviously. but also my own. i took my ryles to the zoo. where he banged his head and knee and ate pebbles (the delicious chocolate treat rather than the small rock) off the ground. and made me laugh until i cried. and my mother made me the best ham sandwich ever. and i think it was just ham and white bread. and dad made fish for lunch, which reminded me of sundays of my childhood (even if i don't think my dad actually cooked a single meal throughout the 80s). i also made cupcakes despite my no baking rule. but on the flip side i fought all temptation and did not buy myself a new dress even though i DESPERATELY need it because i am going to a ball. the opportunity cost though is i go to the ball looking like a hobo. but i'm still a bit proud of my will power.

anyway, the opportunity cost of me telling you any more is that i wont get to find out what happens in episode 9 "samantha growing up". and given the scarcity of my time, samantha wins. i hope this episode has a lot of mona. she's the real star if you ask me. and this dude.

2008-06-19T22:20:00.003+12:00

birthday season continues. yesterday was the hebequeen slash hobos birthday. i hope she had a great day. i will add her birthday card to the pile in my room that remain unsent. it is ironic the way i love writing mail but hate actually sending it. one of those love hate things i was talking about last week.

actually i have a love hate thing with birthdays. especially mine. don't even talk to me about how i feel i was underserved by my workplace this year (ie NO BIRTHDAY CAKE. NO MORNING TEA. NOTHING). again though, note the irony of my unsent birthday cards. i commit the underwhelming people on their birthday crimes too.

"this one goes out to all the birthday ladies" argh, paul mccartney makes me feel nauseous. in a bad way.

other birthdays of note this week include my sister, who has given birth to the lights of my life and for that i'll always be grateful, and jo hubris who i may actually get to meet at some point. maybe (if the stars align). speaking of stars, it was paul mccartney's birthday some time this week (fyi my turn offs include paul mccartney and people who look like him) and lionel ritchie turns older tomorrow too. according to the capital times anyway. a big birthday week you could say. which is why i need to get on with my posting things. number one priority tomorrow - THE POST SHOP.

2008-06-17T23:17:00.004+12:00

so tonight i forked out the thirty or whatever dollars to cinelounge it up while watching sex and the city.

the seats were awesome. the popcorn salty. and the coffee brought to your seat midway through the movie was priceless.

except, as i mentioned it did actually have a price.

the movie was okay. i hate the concept of 'the girls'. everytime 'the girls' were mentioned in the movie a part of me died inside. but basically it was like watching three or four episodes on dvd. ie my idea of a night out.

7/10

2008-06-15T10:38:00.005+12:00

i have a love hate relationship with more things than i care to list. like this mug. although, if i'm being honest, it is mostly love.

when i was a kid my favourite book was little black sambo and the tiger. they made butter and played on slides. the joy of imagining myself on that slide! i thought sambo was about my dad.

i also thought my dad played the cheeky barman, isaac, on the love boat.

imagine if he was though. it would have been AWESOME to be isaac's daughter. i would have probably got to go to acapulco when he had to shoot on location. instead sometimes i'd get to go to the hutt to eat sherbert watch dad play rugby.

and even though i don't want to start listing everything i love hate, i'm gonna give you one more. synth folk music.

actually, i lie. there is no hate.

i love shona laing like i love the all time best new zealand town slogan. you could say, she's right up my hutt valley.

also right up my hutt valley was last night's party at morgue and cazza's. best. mulled wine. ever.

2008-06-09T21:53:00.003+12:00

i made cupcakes in the weekend and was chuffed with myself. then i ate one for breakfast this morning and i was all regrets. cupcakes are a great afternoon tea. and yet at eight am, not so much the right food choice.

i have been listening to the radio news too much. now i'm worried i'm single handedly causing the power crisis. with my baking and my electric blanket and tupac - my laptop. not to mention the amount of charging chelsea clinton, my new york ipod, requires. i decided to switch from nat rad to marcus lush this morning, in the hopes of a more light hearted but still informed start to my day. i'm not convinced marcus was on this morning. because it wasn't even hilarious for one moment. i listened to owner of a lonely heart on chelsea clinton instead.

anyway, as a result i forgot the power crisis stuff until this evening. when i started turning off my house lights furiously. we'll have to see how long this behaviour lasts.

one thing is for sure, i will be laying off the baking for a few weeks. both in the interests of the environment and of my early morning blood sugar levels. of course that starts tomorrow, because now i'm addicted to baking and so i made biscuits tonight. but i made them out of rolled oats so maybe they'll make a better breakfast? plus i undercooked them - which of course means less electicity used for cooking. i'm so environmentally conscious.

ps: you should totally watch the yes video clip linked above. it is like a short film with people "morphing" into animals. brilliant. watch it with the lights out though. i don't want you using needless electricity.

2008-06-07T18:36:00.002+12:00

so i have started to recover from how robert downey jnr is a hunk. i have also almost recovered from going out on thursday night. you know you're old when this happens. which is too depressing for words.

thursday night i went to the launch of the matariki stamps by nz post.

i am not really one for stamps, and i find networking stressful. but the hors d'eourves kept coming and the entertainment was stellar. plus afterwards i got to go to zibibbo for dinner and then to hawthorne lounge to hang out with all blacks, serbian body guards and celebrate cpw's birthday in drunken style. but of course because i'm lame and have to wait for my electric blanket to warm up before i go to bed this all equated to staying up past one am and feeling very very grumpy when i woke up again at six.

which is probably why my eye balls felt like they were being stabbed all day friday. which caused me to want to stab other people's eyes.

today though, i'm feeling more generous. even though i spent hours at work. today, i'm ready to raise some money for mnd. especially when it involves barnaby weir. are you coming along too?

2008-06-04T22:53:00.006+12:00

it's a bird. it's a plane. no it's.... ironman. reow.

so tonight i broke my strict sleep work sleep rule and introduced a movie to my workaday routine. ironman at empire cinema. number one: i'm part of the group island bay massive on facebook. that says it all as far as i'm concerned. number two: robert downey jnr was my second favourite cast member on ally mcbeal. number three: i ordered a large hot chocolate. this all added up to a great night out.

well sort of. i could have ended up with the man of my dreams. two guys were getting tickets behind us. i took a table for my hot chocolate and brownie (i didn't mention the brownie before because it was so rich i still feel ill) and while i was waiting for my flattie to join me i heard the guys. guy one is like "where shall we sit". guy two is like "with those girls". guy one is like "reow [or its less cool equivalent] i know you're away from home a lot, but you're married". so this princess misses out on another prince.

also robert downey jnr and i are two peas in a pod. i was at a press event today (if you watch te karere you will see me being a loser in the background waving my arms around like i'm telling the most interesting story in history). and i really wanted to get up and tell everyone that i was ironman. and that was before i'd even seen the movie.

anyway, i'd give it five out of ten. 10 points for robert, minus five for being a boy movie.

2008-06-02T00:20:00.003+12:00

in honour of the queen and her birthday....

if you've ever been to my house you'll know it is pretty close to the awesomest house in newtown. anyway, last night i was entertaining (sort of) and someone noted my obsession with famous people. i corrected them. my obsession is with people who are royal.

forbes shares my obession with royals, and has made a list of the hottest royals. but the list is wrong. but mostly because prince andrew wasn't at number one. reow.

2008-05-29T22:40:00.004+12:00

tonight i had multiple shots of eighteen dollar a shot whiskey. in an attempt to get me to like the stuff. and that is only part one of my confessions.

part two of my confessions, right now i'm wondering if it is possible to marry an electric blanket. it provides me with EVERYTHING i could possibly want. including the fact that i feel like i may pass out every time i get into bed because i am so utterly euphoric. anyway, the fifty dollars i spent at briscoes may have been better value than the fifty plus dollars on whiskey is all i'm saying.

2008-05-21T23:40:00.003+12:00

so, after laughing my socks off (and squirming a little) at one of the wellington heats of the 48 hour film festival, i got home to a parcel. this is kind of standard at the moment, due to my shopping addiction. but then i realised, due to the whole branded box thing, that it was my first installment of books from amazon dot com. cos i'm reading ten books in ten months as part of a blog challenge. and it is obviously easier to order things from the states than go to my library. hmmm. anyway, ignoring how i repulse myself, i had a parcel.

i open it. get out my books (there were three of them) and notice that amazon had put in a little somethin' somethin' for me.

and all i can say is: MISJUDGED!

and yes. it is a mcd's voucher you see in the top right corner. even if i didn't find it disgusting, how am i supposed to use a US coupon. and did the amazon people even check to see what country they were sending the books before they added the cellphones for soldiers bag? i mean we're not hostile here*. but there are more supportive countries.

anyway, needless to say my celly remains where it is and i stop ordering from amazon. which i was going to do anyway, but their goddamned cheap prices always got me. until now that is.

*for eg, see what the socialist world says here.

2008-05-17T19:36:00.004+12:00

so i'm planning to go dancing because hello, that is the way hip young things spend their saturday nights. but hip young things usually have hip young clothes. but i haven't got a stitch to wear.

ps, this is not a real photo. i just copied and posted two photos with brick walls in them. amazing, i know.

morrissey and i are so in sync over these things. this is said despite how today i did a wardrobe stocktake and i own twenty dresses and nine black skirts. yes. so that is at least 29 things to wear. but you know, nothing young and hip or whatever.

anyway, i am blogging so i remember the exact moment i decided there was a clothes buy freeze. three months. can i do it? only time will tell....

2008-05-14T22:02:00.006+12:00

second only to my love of bookshelves, is my love of books.

which is why it pains me i'm not better at updating my virtual bookshelf on facebook. but whatever.

anyway, tonight i ate hamburgers which meant that when i got home i didn't have to make dinner. which is awesome: more internet time.

which is how i got to reading other people's blogs and deciding that i want to show off my literary knowledge. sort of anyway. you see there is some book about the 1001 books you must read before you die. no doubt there are hundreds of blogs dedicated to how the list is wrong. and you know, it is (no judy blume for example), but frankly i have taken it as a challenge. and so has 3m (not the company) and others. so i'm reading ten books in ten months to take myself from being 5% well read to 6% well read. you too can join the challenge here. where you will also find the full list.

and just so you know, my baseline is

3. On Beauty – Zadie Smith
19. The Curious Incident of the Dog in the Night-Time – Mark Haddon
43. The Corrections – Jonathan Franzen
54. White Teeth – Zadie Smith
63. The Blind Assassin – Margaret Atwood
76. The Ground Beneath Her Feet – Salman Rushdie
93. Memoirs of a Geisha – Arthur Golden
147. The Secret History – Donna Tartt
165. Wild Swans – Jung Chang
272. The Color Purple – Alice Walker
312. The Shining – Stephen King
340. Breakfast of Champions – Kurt Vonnegut, Jr.
358. Fear and Loathing in Las Vegas – Hunter S. Thompson
367. I Know Why the Caged Bird Sings – Maya Angelou
375. Slaughterhouse-five – Kurt Vonnegut, Jr.
408. In Cold Blood – Truman Capote
434. One Day in the Life of Ivan Denisovich – Aleksandr Isayevich Solzhenitsyn
450. The Prime of Miss Jean Brodie – Muriel Spark
451. Catch-22 – Joseph Heller
456. To Kill a Mockingbird – Harper Lee
467. Breakfast at Tiffany’s – Truman Capote
484. On the Road – Jack Kerouac
496. Lolita – Vladimir Nabokov (sort of)
499. The Quiet American – Graham Greene
529. The Catcher in the Rye – J.D. Salinger
547. Nineteen Eighty-Four – George Orwell
563. Brideshead Revisited – Evelyn Waugh
574. The Little Prince – Antoine de Saint-Exupéry
603. Rebecca – Daphne du Maurier
639. Thank You, Jeeves – P.G. Wodehouse (probably)
649. Brave New World – Aldous Huxley
675. Orlando – Virginia Woolf
686. To The Lighthouse – Virginia Woolf
698. Mrs. Dalloway – Virginia Woolf
699. The Great Gatsby – F. Scott Fitzgerald
714. The Garden Party – Katherine Mansfield
726. The Age of Innocence – Edith Wharton
761. A Room With a View – E.M. Forster
799. Jude the Obscure – Thomas Hardy
804. The Adventures of Sherlock Holmes – Sir Arthur Conan Doyle
863. Little Women – Louisa May Alcott
888. Hard Times – Charles Dickens
901. The Tenant of Wildfell Hall – Anne Brontë
902. Wuthering Heights – Emily Brontë
903. Agnes Grey – Anne Brontë
904. Jane Eyre – Charlotte Brontë
932. Northanger Abbey – Jane Austen
933. Persuasion – Jane Austen
936. Emma – Jane Austen
937. Mansfield Park – Jane Austen
938. Pride and Prejudice – Jane Austen
940. Sense and Sensibility – Jane Austen

2008-05-13T22:02:00.003+12:00

i like:

otters

to yell "savage where the chorus at?" that's a reference to a song. an awesome song that is being rereleased or something. i don't pretend to understand the Industry. anyway, check it out thanks to the magic of the internet http://www.mediafire.com/?ajdjm1mvunn
drycleaning. i know it is bad for the environment. and i hate that aspect to it, obviously (so it is just as well i have a high tolerance of filth). but i just love having clean clothes on coat hangers waiting for me to pick them up. plus, based on zero evidence, i have decided my local dry cleaner uses the environmentally kinder type of dry cleaning fluid that i read about on wisegeek.com.
america's most smartest model, and c4 for screening it on an otherwise lame television night. spoiler alert... the link i'm about to give you tells you who won... LINKS RULE
the sound of music.
flowers. and people who send me them at work.
my new deadly ponies handbag. which might be the most beautiful slash expensive thing i've ever bought.
how people still read my blog (according to my calculations at least) even though i've been a slack writer these past weeks.

2008-05-08T22:48:00.002+12:00

i'm probably the most original person ever. because hello, i just realised i'm living in office space. well, there is no milton and no stapler. but there are cover sheets for tps reports and memos about how to use them.

plus the thing about today is that i dressed a bit on the ugly betty side. then i wrote a memo and guess what: not perfect. i guess there is a first for everything but i am just not used to someone changing my writing style. i mean, i have a way with words. i thought. this all lead to me having frozen french fries (heated obviously) and chocolate for dinner. in other words, i was under a bit of a cloud.

thank god there are up sides to my job. like how now i can car pool to work. this stops me being like erin - hating on the bus service with 30 % of my heart. although to be fair, i've had a good run with the buses. and even though i caught a minature sized one after work the other day, which had what i imagine to be the smell of an incontinent homeless person, buses are also a little bit adorable. what with their electric powered drivers and buttons you can press to make them stop. somedays i'm tempted to push the stop button for no reason. like the naughty girls on the bus in form two. mostly i control myself. mostly.

2008-05-05T22:18:00.003+12:00

so basically while i was all negative about my new job it has its bonuses. for example i'm working in what is clearly a male dominated workplace. there is a first for everything i guess.

it is just like i expected. the women's toilets are miles away.

plus men flirt. i'd forgotten. interestingly, there are no flirts in my actual vicinity, but IT are all about inviting you out for coffee. or at least dropping it into conversation casually that they drink coffee. same difference i reckon.

remember when i was in vietnam. that was awesome in terms of boys. but they only wanted me for my sunnies...

this guy stole my sunnies in a handicapped handicrafts shop without warning. i was alarmed, but ready for the photo opportunity. obviously.

this weekend i was invited to hubris hq for a boy party. but i'm pretty lame about these things and in the end watching the West Beverly class of 93 attend their senior prom proved too hard to turn down. brandon walsh is such a loser. unlike hunk of burning love steve.

but, while that was lame i did manage to haul myself out of the relative 'warmth' of my house to prove my friendship and go wedding dress shopping with a bride to be. not only was this awesome in and of itself. but i was reminded of how people hook up at weddings. i know all about this cos i've seen the wedding crashers. fingers crossed for an owen wilson type.

although, right now in all honesty i'd settle for an electric blanket. my house is so not aligned with the world health organization's healthy home guidelines. 18 degrees is the healthy house temperature. that is just a pipe dream for me. which is why i think i've come over all sickly. either that or i have slow developing malaria. which seems unlikely given how i was covered in deet all through vietnam and cambodia without fail.

and in vietnam and cambodia i was hot. stinking hot even. i am struggling to remember the feeling. i bet it was choice.

2008-04-30T22:49:00.003+12:00

i'm so freakin' in to the ukelele right now.

and this picture is proof*. although the biggest proof is that i go to youtube each night before i even check my emails so that i can watch karaoke style ukelele lessons. but it is making me handicapped, mostly because i have lost all feeling in my index finger. i only "know" three chords and my index finger is key to all three.

when i finally can play white sandy beach (of hawaii) on the uke i'm so posting a video. it will be a personal triumph. and then it will become the most watched ukelele video on the internet and i will be so happy.

speaking of happy, i went to a comedy act last night. apart from how i basically went to high school with the comedian (well, the comedian was a boy and i went to a girls school so 'with' is kind of stretching it) it had some excellent moments. and some moments where i was like 'jokes about getting baked aren't that funny'. basically, he was no adam sandler. but then, the tickets were free and two twelve year old boys gave up their seats for us when we walked in cos obviously i'm so old. 7/10.

and, while i'm wearing a reviewers hat, tonight i saw st trinians at the movies. hilarious and unhilarious in equal measure. but i want to marry colin firth so much it hurts. seriously. like i spent about 15 minutes in actual pain when i was thinking about how we may never meet. this - the meeting - is of course the only hurdle. because once we make eye contact it is ALL ON. 7/10 for movie, 12/10 for colin, 1/10 for my relationship with colin.

one final review: the weather. what the? i got stuck in the rain tonight in cuba mall. huddled under a shop awning. my brand new wool suit was soaked. but no sign of damage. unlike my hair. but of course that is partially my own fault for lack of care in the first place. the only plus side i can see, apart from how it will be like AWESOME to put out wet recycling tomorrow morning in the dark, is that tonight the dulcet tones of rain on corrugated iron will likely put me straight to sleep. which is essential because i've just had a shot of turkish coffee and a piece of baklava. i'm basically baked. 4/10.

*although it is actually not proof at all, because in this picture i'm ukelele synching. ie: not actually playing.

2008-04-27T22:40:00.003+12:00

so when i'm doing exciting stuff i don't blog. when i spent four hours watching grey's anatomy, however, i'm all over the blogosphere telling everyone about it.

go figure.

anyway, i'm clearly back from vietnam. this is a photo in hanoi. the only place i was cold in vietnam. everywhere else i was so hot i thought i might expire. so it was just as well we were living the high life with swimming pools. returning home was not as cool as i'd hoped. but there were advantages, like my own bed. and cheese.

oh and i have a new job. you might be all like: didn't you just get a new job. and yes, but this is a different one. one i didn't apply for. again, go figure. but i'm embracing it with open arms. after all it means i'm now only seconds away from strongerlight during the working day, and that i get to walk around with a security card WITH MY PHOTO ON IT. life ambition achieved.

one last thing. i hosted a party last night. you might have known about it, in which case you were probably there and are still buzzing from how awesome it was. if you didn't know about it, i blame myself. i was patchy at best on the invites. but all you need to know is that it was a talent quest and it ruled. there were three categories: performance, baking and visual arts. and many more winners. plus my own entry, a lip synch to hayley mills and hayley mills in the Parent Trap, received honourable mention from the judges who were ENTIRELY UNPROMPTED TO DO SO. i'm thinking of taking my act on the road.

that is probably it. there are other events, such as my inability to sleep, which i will probably blog about later. along with how insomnia is not cured by watching episodes of 90210, but it sure is made more awesome by them. for now, i should attempt sleep. i have a big day tomorrow. what with the new job and all.

2008-04-16T18:19:00.002+12:00

the thing about me right now is that i smell. i know it. but there is very little i can do.

luckily cambodians are all polite and noone says anything. in fact, it is khmer new year so the cambodians, in addition to being nice, are all in high spirits - or high on spirits, it is hard to tell. actually, i'm telling slight fibs, new year finished last night. but the banks still haven't reopened so it is kind of like it is still party time.

the only hint i have had that i'm rancid is when i tried to feed an elephant a banana and she wouldn't have a bar of me. bitch. the baboons, however, have been less picky. THAT'S RIGHT I'M COMMUNING WITH NATURE LIKE IT AIN'T A THING.

luckily there are pools everywhere and after a swim there are two or three blissful minutes of being a little bit cool. that plus i'm basically addicted to aircon.

today i went to angkor thom and checked out some temples. i took photos and posed. i am finding that after three solid weeks of selfies that i've kind of grown weary of them and have started to let other people take photos of me. unprecedented. i also saw more elephants and a monkey or two. and used my orange scarf (which i will probably burn when i get home) as a sweat band. we have a guide who i kind of adore who tells us jokes in perfect english and makes sure he points out every interesting photo opportunity for us. but more i adore my driver who hands me bottles of iced water and freezes refreshing towels for us and then opens the door so i can get into the air conditioned van. oh, did i not mention that we're on a private tour? yeah, we have our own driver and own guide. and it all happened by accident. I'M SO MIDDLE CLASS I CAN'T STAND IT.

i have also found my new favourite place for smoothies in an airconditioned white space where you lie on beds! just like that sex and the city episode, only this is siem reap, not new york.

i would tell more but i don't want to exhaust my stories plus my internet runs out in two moments. which is like a metaphor for this holiday which is sadly on its last legs. clean clothes though are an exciting new chapter for me. one that i will be willing to embrace around 2pm on saturday.

2008-04-09T02:06:00.003+12:00

i am in hoi an. it is beautiful. and i wonder if monty was kicked off dancing with the stars. probably. if i could be bothered i'd check stuff but i'd rather await an email update from AL (hint hint).

i love vietnam.

today i went to my son sanctuary and then climbed marble mountain, which wasn't a mountain so much as a staircase, and hung out in caves EVEN THOUGH I COULD HEAR ANIMALS SQUEEKING. i am so goddamned brave.

i have eaten a lot of great food too. oh my god, the vietnamese know how to make a salad. light on the vegetables, heavy on the vinegar and shrimps. they also know how to make bread and banana pancakes. the two things (apart from cheese) i think may be my very favourite foods of all time. the vietnamese don't really know how to run hotels yet. which is why so far we've been kicked out of one hotel and in another asked if three people could share one bed (on the assurance it was a big bed, but guess what: it wasn't). everything else though is faultless. unlike my bike riding. which if you are my facebook friend you may have realised - my cycling is crap. which is why i fell off into a tree when i was trying to find china beach. like a soldier in the vietnam war i sought refuge on the white sand shores of china beach. but no dana delany for me. only a street urchin trying to sell me beads. i showed her my injury, seeking sympathy. she told me shit happens. i bought a five dollar necklace. afterall, it was good advice.

anyway, one other thing about vietnam, it is effing hot. which is why i'm in the hotel lobby right now. i came out to get them to adjust the air-con to twenty degrees because it feels like thirty five in our room. they seemed to have done it but to be sure i'm lingering out of the room as long as poss.

tomorrow is my last day in hoi an. i will miss it, but there is so much more of vietnam to see. and since i declare whole heartedly that i love vietnam, i guess i'd better get right on now and see it.

goodnight (and i hope monty made it to the finale).

2008-04-04T00:31:00.004+13:00

i am basically addicted to vietnamese food now. it only took three days.

i have had culture shock and spring rolls. i have played yatzy with swedes and swum in halong bay with the french. i have eaten salad even though i promised my travel doctor i wouldn't. not to mention the precut fruit i have risked my health for.

and the shopping. i have become a bargaining machine. i walk away saying "too expensive". and you'll all be pleased to hear that i may have bought even bigger sunnies than i already owned.

i am in hanoi. the capital of vietnam. but have only spent two days here. the bulk of my time has been in halong bay - the unesco world heritage site. it took my breath away. my journal, which i have been obsessively keeping, is full of gush about it. i needn't repeat it here. but i have been blown away. my legs are sore though from the number of steps i have climbed to get good panoramic shots of the bay.

tonight i will eat pho. my favourite vietnamese dish so far (although their croissants rate very highly too). a reunion with my swedish and french companions. i can't wait to tell them about my bargain hunting...

2008-03-31T13:44:00.003+13:00

there is a hotel in singapore i am in love with. the fullerton. if you are an eligible bachelor you will win my heart if you take me there on a romantic retreat. it probably costs a bomb to stay there which would add to the romance of course. it is so very flash that the bathrooms have glass basins, the conceirge checks things on the internet for you and taxis charge you four dollars just for waving down a taxi near the fullerton. it oozes class.

i didn't stay there for obvious reasons. but i did take a boat ride past and then later use their conveniences. it was like heaven on earth.

singapore has been a-ok. my cellphone semi works here but apparently is sending messages multiple times which is just fantastic. overcharging me no doubt. perhaps i should turn the phone off now. what else? um it is h.o.t. and i have swum a lot to recover. there are lots of white men with asian girlfriends and the orchids are beautiful. i look like crap no doubt due to the humidity and the general tiredness making of travel. added to that in auckland i got to sit in the plane for three hours while mechanics checked out a problem on the plane. which turned a ten and a half our journey into a thirteen hour nightmare.

anyway, singapore airports very famous free internet is about to run out on me so should end here. today i fly to hanoi for some hustle and bustle and maybe even seeing a long dead ho chi minh. if i'm very lucky.

2008-03-24T13:34:00.002+13:00

since the whole cat incident my easter weekend has improved. i spent friday doing laundry, which obviously is an improvement on the cat. and watching so you think you can dance. my quest to bring tele back continues.

saturday i just about passed out from exhaustion numerous times. i went to craft two point oh where i saw about eight million things i wanted to buy. i restricted myself though. because i'm going to vietnam in under a week. i will hold off buying unnecessaries until then. i couldn't resist the cupcakes however. and got a sugar rush and a headache immediately after.

i also did my new favourite saturday activity: la cloche followed by playing with the puppies at animates. rounded out by a trip to the supermarket and looking for trendy but unrequired homewears at nood, my day just kind of evaporated.

then i went to the palliser hotel. the what? exactly. some of my readers will appreciate that. anyway, it doesn't have a website but since i'm evidently all about links today, try this. it was for my cousin's 21st. the theme was black and white....

and my cousin did the mtv standard birthday party appearance dressed in red. so super sweet sixteenth. there was lots of food. and speeches. and singing (they even sang my favourite song of childhood) and some fights. i even went to break up the fight i saw. the three taekwon do lessons i had that time have made me cocky. but there was no need as my cousin got there first to do same.

after speeches, pavlova and some dancing i left to head back to town for 24 hour party people. i was just about dead on my feet by that point. in part because instead of wearing sneakers, which would have been sensible, i was wearing black girl shoes to match my black and white outfit. my feet just about fell off. and my eyes were just about permanently closed. but i managed to dance up a storm to the arcade fire and interpol in particular, but to most of the awesome music generally. and my favourite barman was there. and he recognised me. it really must be love.

but even that adrenaline couldn't keep me on the dancefloor after two thirty. by which time the line to get in was metres and metres long.

yesterday i brunched at the recovery room, where i was also recognised by staff. i am such the girl about town. then AL and i read fashion and gossip mags at scorching bay where we could feel the jealousy of everyone else at the beach who wished they were us on our pink beach chairs. i also got to play cards with my family and eat a sunday roast care of my mother.

today though is when it starts going bad again. today i'm trying to get a bit of work done. i just have a few things i want to finish off before vietnam. damned sense of responsibility. it is so lame. i wish i could be more devil-may-care. anyway, so far i've put in about thirty seconds. i have spent the bulk of my time being an excellent aunt at the swimming pool and shopping for new slippers at the warehouse (what happened to the reserve i displayed at craft two point oh i wonder?).

oh and it is my birthday this week. i've put some energy into pretending it isn't real. but i am starting to come to grips with it. it being old age obviously. maybe the black cat that attacked me was just the shadow of old age rather than the shadow of death as i first predicted.